Which Smexy Creature Are You? The Sequel

What exactly is this smexiness I keep hearing so much about, you may ask. Or you could already be enlightened. Either way, I ought to drone on about it a bit, as this is the description area. Smexiness is the quality of sensual appeal attributed to creatures of the night, as opposed to sexiness, the corresponding human trait. Whereas not all creatures of the night have much of it, they are collectively referred to as "smexy," for lack of desire to often use the drawn out phrase, "creatures of the night," on the part of most.

Now, we both know that even the dullest night creatures kick vast quantities of arse and that anyone with any sense, or even most with an exciting lack of it, are or wish to be among them. That's a given. But considerably less aspirants are certain which smexy creature they would be best suited to be, and many current smexy creatures have admitted to wanting to take a quiz on it anyway. I know. I've done my research. Therefore, I now present to you, Which Smexy Creature are You? The Sequel!!

Created by: E Lunatic

Are you ready for...
Our "When Will I Die" Quiz?

  1. Do you love killing people?
  2. If you were fighting someone, would you be likely to brutally mangle them in completely unneccessary ways?
  3. If you were to kill someone, would you proceed to eat them, or otherwise use their corpse for some productive purpose?
  4. How often can you be found eating something?
  5. Is there anyone whom you consider your "kin", so to speak, that the average person would not?
  6. Humans, they...
  7. When visiting your refridgerator, must you constantly shuffle your jars of pickled livers about in order to reach your jars of pickled hearts?
  8. Is it possible that you could be mistaken for a human?
  9. How many dusty old tomes and forbidden manuscripts can be found around your home?
  10. Do you own any astronomical charts?
  11. Do you own any astrological charts?
  12. Do you struggle with any of the following: identity-related confusion, fiscal issues, social angst, general stress?
  13. Do you have an unexplainable attraction to the Falkland islands?
  14. Would you consider yourself as intentionally inconspicuous?
  15. Do you consider bleach, a battery-powered FM radio, and a crowbar to be enough to kill someone without ever coming near them?
  16. Do you often use a false name?
  17. Do you own any items with a pentagram emblazoned upon them? A heartagram?
  18. Which of the following is a type of board?
  19. Have you ever paid attention to the pattern of lines on your hands?
  20. Mugwort tea!
  21. Do people often assume that you've made humour when you, in fact, have not?
  22. When people talk about how they're feeling, are you often hopelessly confused?
  23. Do people often accuse you of being foolish over shortcomings of yours which you do not consider at all related to intelligence?
  24. Which is the ninth dimension?
  25. Do you ever have a desire to consume blood?
  26. Can the average schmuck tell the difference between you and a stock goth kid?
  27. Does any sort of anger, disgust, or excitement trigger your saying of anything along the lines of, "Bleagh...!"
  28. Do you have noticeably larger than average eyebrows?
  29. Do you chew with only one half of your mouth open?
  30. Do you know how to play Gargoyle?
  31. Do you flip your collar up whenever possible?
  32. Can you often be found galivanting with a quirky friend who possesses any of the following: hunchback, fingerless gloves, suspenders, external hard drive, wooden pole, or speech impediment?
  33. If you were hit with a blast from a flamethrower, would you retain the capacity to run into the perpetrator, setting them on fire as well?
  34. Which of the following would you prefer?
  35. Can you easily manage to create a complete breakdown of social order with the help of a few of your friends, but find it an outstanding challenge to turn a doorknob?
  36. Are you completely indiscriminate in which parts of your prey you eat?
  37. Have you ever walked more than 30 metres with a small animal gnawing on your leg without noticing it?
  38. Are you familiar with any of the following musicians: The Zombeatles, The Rolling Kidney Stones, Bob Killin, Dead Zeppelin, Fester Fangs?
  39. Do you fake being drunk because you are unable to technically become inebriated?
  40. Do you pal around with shifty occultists and wild-eyed loons?
  41. Do painkillers, aspirin, and anthestetics have unusually little effect on you?
  42. Have you ever been attracted to someone by the size of their canines, hands, or eyebrows?
  43. Before reading this, have you ever indepentantly come to the conclusion that you are not comfortable eating the meat of livestock, but also believe that the agricultural industry is corrupt, thus leaving one obvious food source, the consumption of which you percieve as having virtually no negative effects on anything whatsoever?
  44. Can you easily and with little thought name all of the following in one-word answers: your name, clique/style, political ideology, religion, moral philosophy, most valued personal trait, and second-largest city of Finland?
  45. Where would you rather be right now?
  46. ...Continued...
  47. Of these, which is your favourite sub-genre of metal?
  48. Did you actually bother to read the description? If not, are you aware of the schizm between sexiness and smexiness?

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Quiz topic: Which Smexy Creature am I? The Sequel