Fire in the Dark
Thread Topic: Fire in the Dark
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just casually bashes head against wall.
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screaming and ramming my head into the wall won't help...
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f**k this...
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goddamnit
i can't think straight. -
my head hurts...
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i hate the feeling when i wake up and check the computer and get excited when blizz responded, but give it a few minutes/hours and it feels like i'm burdening them or being a problem.
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i'm starting to cry again. i'm unable to do this
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today was good. really good. i had fun. me and my girlfriend played minecraft and i had time with my mom!
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not sure about that tho-----
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i'm not----
i just got emotionally drained youfool. -
i can't go back and read blizz and i's rp thread. it makes me cry because it hurts what i used to be. i know i suffered a lot in nh but i still had ran and blizz and i were close. much closer than we are now. i hate having these pathetic little meltdowns. i just prove every time that i am a problem, that i am a burden. i can't do this... i can't...
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i need to stop doing this. even though i say i like day-by-day plans, i somehow always worry about the future.
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i get so overwhelmed...
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crying again. i'm a f**king useless soul
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we told cyrystal that the others hate me. alex is the hated one now. all the trauma, all the pain, all the weight the others used to bear, now fell back on me. it hurts. i have no way out since all others except for don and anna are jerks too me. anna is barely awake, usually crying, don is trying to stay the front, to keep from letting everyone know how much we all changed. i can't handle it. every night alone, i give in, don lets me out and i cry. over stupid stuff. songs, responses from blizz, words. thanks to devin, curo, and zumae we're now a f**ked up mess. thanks so f**king much guys. thanks.
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