How can I get my sister to move in with us?
- Locked due to inactivity on Apr 11, '17 3:54am
Thread Topic: How can I get my sister to move in with us?
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Okay. So. First of all, my sister lives with my mom and I live with my dad.
My sister (she goes by Cindy on here) comes over to the apartment my dad and I live in on the weekends, but she lives with my mom and goes to school in the city my mom lives in.
Reasons my sister should move in with us:
*Better schools. My mom lives in a very ghetto area and the schools suck. If she moved in with us, she'd go to a certain school that happens to be one of the top in the state. I went to the middle school my sister is currently at, and it is an awful school. It has a 'D' rating, and the one she'd move to has either a 'B' or an 'A' rating (can't remember which). She'd learn a lot more and have a lot more opportunities academically.
*Better area. Like I said, it's really ghetto and trashy where mh mom lives. Where we live is a lot better. We live in a college town, so there's a more diverse and involved community. There's a lot more to do and learn. It's a great place, and wayyyy less drugs. Speaking of which
*My mom. My mom sucks. She physically and emotionally abused me for years, my brother before that. She has and may still do drugs, and she lets homeless people stay in a house that isn't even hers. She doesn't feed good food. I remember days where she didn't feed us at all. She's a slob with bugs and rodents in her home. She doesn't take care of herself or anything she owns. She leaves to go party in the middle of the night (which would be less awful if her neighbourhood wasn't so dangerous), and when she gets caught she just dumps my sister on my sick grandma. So most of the time, my sister isn't even with my mom. She ditched me and my sister for an entire year and we had to live with my grandma, but my mom still got the child support and claimed us on her taxes. I have trouble even calling her a "mom", because she never took care of us. I don't thi k she abuses my sister like she did to me and my brother, probably because bow she's afraid of being caught. She's incredibly f---ing unstable and shouldn't have children under her care at all.
*Better living conditions. As mentioned above,my mom's house is awful. My mom doesn't pay her bills, so my gramma has to instead, which is milking my gramma dry (I think she may kick my mom out soon). Sometimes, she doesn't have electricity. And sometimes, she doesn't even have hot water. The house is completely trashed. Nothing is clean. It makes me think of Annie Wilkes' house in the book Misery, when Annie goes into a really bad depressive state and trashes the house with food and dirty dishes all over. It's disgusting and nobody should be subjected to living in that mess. I'm a neat freak, so I keep it hella clean over here or else I'd lose my sanity like I did living with her.
The problem is that Cindy doesn't want to live here. She has animals at my moms. She knows that they'll die if left alone with my mom. The poor dogs' ears are already bleeding from fleas, and the cat is losing all of its fur. My sister is probably the only reason the damn things aren't starving.
She also doesn't want to move schools. She has friends at her current school. She also has a girlfriend, who goes to a different school right now but might move back to Cindy's school soon.
Also, you might have guessed this, but my mom is very negligent. My mom doesn't care enough to discipline my sister, so Cindy kind of gets to do whatever the f--- she wants (which isn't good for her anyway).
For legal reasons, my dad can't take my mom to court like he should, so if my sister moves here IT has to be her choice. But she's only in middle school and kind of overemotional, so she doesn't really understand where her priorities should be and that living with my mom is toxic. She's said something about moving with my gramma so she's still close to her animals and at the same school, but my gramma is too old and sick to have to worry about raising a child. We can't do that to my gramma.
At this point, I'm kind of desperate. Is there ANYTHING you guys can think of that I can say to my sister to convince her?
(sorry if this is rambly, it's an emotional topic for me + I'm hopped up on caffeine rn) -
Is it possible for her to move her animals to where you live?
If that's one of her main concerns maybe that would help? Or if they are stray animals or something similar maybe call whatever animal protection agency runs in America?
Sit her down and explain to her what the consequences of remaining with your mother could cause her later in life?
Sorry if I'm not being helpful I've never been in this kind of situation -
We can't because we live in an apartment, and I'm allergic to cats and dogs anyway. I'm thinking about calling Animal Control, but they'd put the animals down if they don't get adopted and my sister would never forgive me.
I've been trying and I'm going to have to keep trying that route I guess, even though she rarely listens.
Thank you, any support I can get right now is great. -
That's horrible.
Maybe you could try to brbibe her as well? It would probably depend on age. I don't mean like " Oh I'll give you money if you " blah blah blah" but more like slip in small rewards and stuff and more treats while she's at your dads so she may want to stay there? I'm not sure I'm not very good at pshycology.
This will probably be my last bit of advice sorry seth -
That's actually not a bad idea. Thank you. I may try that. Thank you a lot.
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You're welcome.
It's how we managed to coax my sister to go to school.
Everyday she'd find an item in her lunch that she really liked.
And if she cut school the number would go down. so hopefully it works for your sister. -
did you even read the thing?
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There's obviously way more than just the ghetto
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Well, let's see. There's a stop sign in my mom's yard. There was a drive-by shooting at that stop sign a couple years ago. There's a lot of drugs and gang activity, and the convenient store just around the corner was robbed at gunpoint three days in a row. It's pretty f---ing bad. Not as bad as southside OKC, but pretty bad, especially compared to the place in which I currently reside.
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*oh, and we lived in the house when the drive by occurred, but it was during the day so we were at school, only my moms ex boyfriend was home
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Someone stole my moms car tire one night while we were asleep, and her ex bf chased someone down the street in his boxers one night when he caught someone stealing from his truck
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So I um
I talked to my dad about it. He said I seem to have put a lot of thought into this and I brought up some good points.
I think I convinced him to be a little more aggressive in convincing her. I hope we can do this. I really do. -
lol trust me
nobody wants to f---ing live in the hood
why is this even a question? if it's for her WELLBEING THAN YES
why the f--- does this thread even exist -
*THEN
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Because it has to be her choice to move and I need more ways to convince her since she's a moron and won't listen.
I mean, if you read the whole thing, you'd recognize that as the main issue. But then again, you are illiterate, so
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