funny quiz number 1

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Analysis: Most folks probably wish they had the gumption to emulate the example above and tell the unvarnished truth, just once, on a stupid job application. Ironically, you can include the man who came up with the idea among them. Greg Bulmash, who authored this piece as a joke in April 1997, says he never submitted it, nor even intended to submit it, to an actual employer. Instead, he posted it on his humor Website, from which it was copied and distributed via newsgroups and email joke lists under a new preamble claiming: "This is an actual job application someone submitted at a McDonald's fast-food establishment AND THEY HIRED HIM!"

this is a quiz I threw together in the hopes of putting a smile on some people's faces. But as I have mentioned in the paragraph above everything in this quiz is 100% true

Created by: dannylover321

Are you ready for...
Our "When Will I Die" Quiz?

  1. What is your age?
  2. What is your gender?
  1. This is an actual job application someone submitted at a McDonald's fast-food establishment AND THEY HIRED HIM! (original editor's note: I would have hired him too!!)
  2. NAME: Greg Bulmash
  3. DESIRED POSITION: Reclining. HA HA, but seriously, whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the first place
  4. DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that's not possible make an offer and we can haggle.
  5. EDUCATION: Yes
  6. LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility
  7. SALARY: Less than I'm worth
  8. MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes
  9. REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked
  10. HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: Any
  11. PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p.m., Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday
  12. DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they're better suited to a more intimate environment
  13. MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here?
  14. DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 LBS.?: Of what?
  15. DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would be "Do you have a car that runs?"
  16. HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may already be a winner of the Publishers Clearinghouse Sweepstakes
  17. DO YOU SMOKE?: Only when set on fire
  18. WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy super model who thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I'd like to be doing that now
  19. DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?: No, but I dare you to prove otherwise
  20. SIGN HERE: Scorpio with Libra rising

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