YO MAMMA JOKES
- Locked due to inactivity on Aug 4, '16 4:13pm
Thread Topic: YO MAMMA JOKES
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Yo mamma is so hairy,she's related to big foot!
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yo momma so hairy kids lookin fo' a summa job mistake her for their neighbor's lawn
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Yo mamma's so fat,she can't fit in the shower so she has to go to an ocean and take a bath.
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Yo mamma's so fat,when yo family goes traveling they have to tie yo mamma on the top of the car.
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Yo mama so dirty that she was banned from a sewage facility because of sanitation worries!
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Yo mamma's so stupid,she found a golden retreiver and set in her front yard as a statue.
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Yo Moma So Old
she left her purse on Noah's Ark.
Jurassic Park brought back the memories...
when she ran the 100 metre dash, they timed her with a sundial.
she still owes Moses a dollar.
when she was at school...there was No history class!
she uses her hot flushes to heat her cup of Tea
she co-wrote the 4th Commandment.
when I asked for her ID she handed me a rock
she even made Yoda jealous.
she recalls when the Grand Canyon was a ditch.
the fire department are on standby when you light her birthday cake
when she gave birth, You came out with Dentures.
she sat in front of Jesus in 1st grade
her first job was as Cain and Abel's baby-sitter.
her birthday expired.
when Moses parted the Red Sea, he found yo momma fishing on the other side!
she got the first copy of the Ten Commandments.
You Momma so old she invented these Crazy Pranks & Hilarious Gags
Anything Yo's - So Old ...
Yo Grandpa so old his social security number is 000-000-001
Yo Priest so old he's got Adam and Eve's autograph
Yo Archeology Professor so old we found cave drawings of her.
Your Wife getting so old she startin to fart out Mummy dust
You Postman so damn old his zip code is 00001.
Yo' geeky Star Wars friend so old he used to baby sit Yoda
Yo Doctor so old he uses chewing gum as a bandaid.
Yo hairdresser so old she used to cut Betty Rubble's hair
You so old you used to gang bang wid the Flintstones
Yo' home helper so old she was once a waitress at the last supper
Yo Grannie so old Spielberg hired her as historical consultant on Jurassic Park
Yo Nana so old she the only Creature in Jurassic Park they never had to animate
You Gardener so old she uses T-Rex dropping as fertilizer.
Yo History teacher so damn old he was co-author of the Dead Sea scrolls
Your Aunties so old that when God said 'let there be light', she was the one flicking on the light switch.
Yo Math teacher so old he baby-sat for Pythagorus
Yo Minister so old he used to get sermon tips from Zeus.
Yo Bookie so old he offered odds of 4 to 1 on Adam eating the apple
Yo Poppa so old and ugly they call him Captain Caveman
Yo sister so old she's more ancient than everything seen on the Antiques Road Show
yo' Mother in law so old she the only one at the old folks home with a senior citizens discount.
Yo' Papa so ancient that Mel Gibson hired him to offer insights on what life was like with William Wallace
I told yo big sister to act her own age...and she died.
You Dog so old it farts out dust.
Yo Boyfriend so old his birth certificate says "Expired" on it.
Yo Computer geek friend so old he used to babysit Pascal
Your Girlfriend's so old, she invented the term 'oldest profession in the world'
Yo' mother-in-law so ancient she's in Jesus's yearbook!
Yo Gardener's so damn old he remembers when the Garden of Eden was just a plant
Yo' big brother so old, he used to run Track with dinosaurs.
Your mother-in-law so freakin old she's got ROman Numerals on her birth certificate
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Yo mama so nasty that pours salt water down her pants to keep her crabs fresh
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i said that already!
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Yo mamma's so stupid,she thought a happy meal would make her happy.
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Yo mamma's so stupid,she thought The red Queen had red skin so she has white make-up on.(You would get this if you saw Alice in Wonderland)
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Yo Momma so Smelly
the government make her wear a Biohazard warning
she made Right Guard call for backup.
even the dogs won't smell her.
an old blind geezer walking by asked her 'yo, how much for the shrimp platter?"
that when she spread her legs, I got seasick...
she wiz playin in my Sand Box and the cat came along and buried her.
her poo is glad to escape.
that standing next to a skunk, the Skunko smells sweet!
that the only dis I'm gonna give her is Disinfectent...
that when you was being born, the doctor's and nurses all had to wear oxygen masks...
even sewer rats get outta her way...
that farmers use her bathwater as liquid fertilizer...
Yo Momma so Dirty
she has to creep up on the bath water.
that standin next to a tramp, she make the tramp look like a butler.
that her house is so dirty I gotta wipe my feet before I go back outside.
she lost 2 stone after taking a shower
that even the Swamp Thing insisted she showered.
that Saddam Hussain tried to import her bath water to use as chemical weapons.
Yo Momma so Greasy
Texaco buy oil from her
she got a job at the cinema - buttering popcorn with her leg hair...
her freckles slipped off.
the Chip Shop uses her sweat as Deep Fry
she sweats butter, syrup, excretes jam...and has a full time job at the 'Pancake Palace' wiping pancakes across her forheed
her idea of bottled water is the left over oil slime from a bacon, sausage and egg fry up.
she uses bacon as a band aid.
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where the fck r u finding all these
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Yo mama's so fat that a $700 billion bailout would only keep her fed for a week.
Yo mama's so fat that the housing bubble popped because she sat on it!
Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks the G8 is a Value Meal at McDonald's.
Yo mama's so fat that she supported the bailout just because she wanted a 'barrel of pork'.
Yo mama's so stupid that she thinks sub-prime is a way to cut steak.
Yo mama's so fat that Sarah Palin can see her from her house.
Yo mama's so fat that Sarah Palin can't see Russia anymore!.
Yo mama's so fat that her biography is called "The Audacity of Hardee's".
Yo mama's so greasy that her face could free the U.S. from its dependence on foreign oil.
Yo mama's so ugly that you could put lipstick on a pig and it would look ten times better than her!
Yo mama's so fat that "ACORN" registered her to vote eight times!
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Yo mama is so old that her birth certificate says "expired" on it.
Yo mama is so old that that when she was in school there was no history class.
Yo mama is so old that I told her to act her own age, and she died.
Yo mama is so old that she knew Burger King while he was still a prince.
Yo mama is so old that her social security number is 1.
Yo mama is so old that her birth certificate is written in Roman numerals.
Yo mama is so old that she has Adam & Eve's autographs.
Yo mama is so old that she co-wrote the Ten Commandments.
Yo mama is so old that she has an autographed bible.
Yo mama is so old that the candles cost more than the birthday cake.
Yo mama is so old that when she farts, dust comes out.
Yo mama is so old that she owes Fred Flintstone a food stamp.
Yo mama is so old that she drove a chariot to high school.
Yo mama is so old that she took her drivers test on a dinosaur.
Yo mama is so old that she DJ'd at the Boston Tea Party.
Yo mama is so old that she walked into an antique store and they kept her.
Yo mama is so old that she baby-sat for Jesus.
Yo mama is so old that she knew Mr. Clean when he had an afro.
Yo mama is so old that she knew the Beetles when they were the New Kids on the Block.
Yo mama is so old that when God said "Let there be light" she was there to flick the switch.
Yo mama is so old that she needed a walker when Jesus was still in diapers.
Yo mama is so old that when Moses split the red sea, she was on the other side fishing.
Yo mama is so old that her memory is in black and white.
Yo mama is so old that she's mentioned in the shout out at the end of the bible.
Yo mama is so old that she planted the first tree at Central Park.
Yo mama is so old that she sat next to Jesus in third grade.
Yo mama is so old that she has a picture of Moses in her yearbook.
Yo mama is so old that she knew Cap'n Crunch while he was still a private.
Yo mama is so old that when she was young rainbows were black and white.
Yo mama is so old that she called the cops when David and Goliath started to fight.
Yo mama is so old that when she was born, the Dead Sea was just getting sick.
Yo mama’s so old, when she breast feeds, people mistake her for a fog machine.
Yo mama is so old that she was a waitress at the Last Supper.
Yo mama is so old that she owes Jesus a dollar
Yo mama is so old that she ran track with dinosaurs.
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