I need advice and your opinion on this
- Locked due to inactivity on Sep 9, '17 3:54am
Thread Topic: I need advice and your opinion on this
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So, one of my friends asked me out May if this year and I said yes. I went through shell and back to get my parents to meet him and they finally did. My parents like him and said he was nice and gentleman like.
Just a note about my parents. They are religious, so they make me and my sister wear skirts all of the time. If I have any ideas that don't agree with theirs, they get mad and huffed up about it. We have a dress code as for what's modest and not etc.
Well, one day my boyfriend was asking my mom something and they got into a heated debate. They both said some choice words to each other. My mom ended up telling my dad and the forced me (they told me what to write and made me send it) to break up with him, when I didn't want to.
A couple of days later had to sneak and borrows a friend's phone to tell him my parents made me send that message and I didn't want to break up with him. (We are still going out, but my parents don't know anything about it.)
I want to be with my boyfriend, but if they find out I'm talking to him the consequences would be pretty bad. I have a year and a couple of days before I turn eighteen and I was going to try to keep the relationship hid from my parents till then, but I just want your advice on what I should do. If you want to, I can explain the situation further. -
* hell
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I know that parents sometimes change their minds because they see something dangerous. They could have maybe thought that him debating with so much passion was a sign of disrespect. With that ideology, they may have thought that he could do the same thing to you if you didn't agree with something he said.
(I am just trying to see through your parents point of view)
However, I get why you are still with him. Everyone has different opinions and your parents should respect that. Hiding your relationship will take a toll on the relationship you have with your parents though. They may not listen, but maybe you can prove to them that he is worth it? The situation you are in seems to be delicate. If your parents find out that you disobeyed them, they might become petty and take out the anger on you as well. So I think it's best to try to get them to see the situation more clearly. -
I will try.
Thank you~! -
I'd basically say the same as Kalafina. Also, it might help if your boyfriend apologized to your mother for every wrong thing he said in that arguement. That way, your parents will know that if he ever seriously argues with you, then he can be equally humble and apologize. I know it's hard to do that, but if you ask your boyfriend to and he agrees then you'll be able to see how much he loves you. That'll strenghthen your relationship, and hopefully help your parents accept him more.
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Stardust1: Okay, I'll talk to him
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that's tough. Heres what I've learned in my 22 yrs on earth bout this type situation:
your parents will probably never like any of your boyfriends unless they pick him out -- in which case you would not like him
the more they don't want you with him the more you'll wanna be with him
I agree with what Stardust says see if he'll apologize that will show them how much he really wants to be with you most guys will not take the time and do not have the courage to talk to a girls parents.
and I agree with Kalafina maybe they see something bad that you don't see (but they always will..) and it'll probably be harder to hide and hurt your relationship with your parents -
coolme3: Thank you. I'm hoping to find the right time to talk to my parents about it.
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