*** Love Letters ***

If you don't like sad stories then turn back now. This is by far my best series yet, and yes I'm still going to continue the others. I just put them on hold for a while because I got the idea for this one and I needed to write it.

I hole you enjoy it as much as I like writing it. And xxblutixx you are amazing! If it wasn't for you and _ViolaLover_ I wouldn't have kelt writing. I owe you guys a ton! Please comment and tell me what you think!

Created by: Pink_Zebra

  1. The first time I saw him I that my eyes were playing tricks on me. He was gorgeous. Then I had closed my eyes and taken a deep breath, now I would have turned away. Don't get me wrong, I love Carson to pieces, but the things little things that he's done over the last year have added up to one big heartbreaking discovery. Carson had cancer, leukemia actually. He was dying, and it was tearing my life apart, bit by bit. He said not to worry, that he was getting better. But I could tell things were just the opposite. The way his mother lingered at the door when he left the house, how his hugs weren't as tight. Everything was different, and that was only the beginning.
  2. This morning I woke up with a huge wait on my shoulders, shoving me down. Happiness was barried somewhere deep down inside of me, but I couldn't find it. Doing my usual wake up routine seemed to take longer than usual, and it felt useless to eat breakfast. After all how many times did Carson have left to eat breakfast? That thought made me cry, like I head so many times in the past week. Carson had told me to be strong and not to cry. I codnt help it though, I wasn't the type of person who could be strong. I was the type to cry my eyes out until I'd welt oceans and no more tears would come. He knew that though, and I think he was just trying to tell himself to be brave. We still had time together and that was all that mattered. I rushed out the door munching on a granola bar. I was headed for the park where Carson and I had agreed to meet this morning. The air was cold and I didn't have a jacket, I had been in too much of a rush to bother putting one on. When I got to the park my teeth were chattering so hard I thought they might all fall out. I didn't pay attention to them though, I could see Carson sitting on our (our) bench in the distance. I sprinted towards him, hair flying in all directions. When I sat down beside him some of my hair was sticking to my lipgloss and he brushed it away tenderly. I looked in his eyes and saw longing and regret. As well as sorrow. I kissed on those pale pink lips of his and his mood seemed to lighten. Once I drew back again for a breath I felt the load ease of my shoulders. I had found my happiness. Carson smiled a small smile, not one of his winning grins. That's when I knew, the day was close, and we didn't have long before we were separated forever.
  3. I felt me eyes tear up and Carson pulled me in close, kissing the top of my head lightly. It was moments like this that I loved, only when they were full of happiness not sorrow. I let him hold me, draw me close, as I cried. It was all too much! I couldn't live without Carson. He was my love, my life.
  4. We spent the rest of the morning like that, and then he walked me home hand in hand. I cried for most of the day after that. Except when Carson called me to make sure I was ok. That made my heart break into a million pieces, the fact that he was checking to make sure I was ok when I really should be asking him that. I skipped lunch and had a small dinner, then cried myself to sleep. In the middle of the night I woke and couldn't get back to sleep. I texted Carson 'I'm coming over' and climbed out my bedroom window, not waiting for a reply. I sprinted all the way to his house, and managed to climb the pinetree outside of his bedroom window without hurting myself. I slipped inside and crawled into bed with him. We lay there staring at each for what seemed like hours. And then I kissed him. Long and hard.
  5. That was our first night sleeping together in the same bed. I got up early and left a note for Carson on the pillow. It was 5:00 in the morning and hard to find my way down the pinetree, and I slipped. I fell about 12 feet to the ground and stayed there staring up into the tree's branches for a while as I caught my breath. I then got up and ran home. I needed a shower. I needed Carson. I needed everything to be the way it had been before. No pain, no tears, and no cancer.
  6. I took a shower and put on some clean pjs. Slipping under the covers I fell asleep again, and dreamed about what it would be like with Carson gone. I hated that dream. It was dreadful even to think of him leaving, and here I was dreaming about it. I woke up crying so hard I was shaking. I couldn't take it. It was too much.
  7. I smelled pancakes downstairs and had to drag myself out of bed. Today was Monday, school. The weight on my shoulders was back, only this time it was heavier. I got dressed and headed downstairs to munch on some food. It was bound to be tasteless. All the food was now, all I could taste was grief. I ate some pancakes and hopped on the bus. I got to school and the first to periods passed as usual. Then I started to wonder where Carson was. I should have seen him by now, I should have given him his morning kiss. And that's when I got called to the office.
  8. It was Carson. He was in the hospital.
  9. My mom drove fast. And we got there in a few minutes. It seemed like every second was an hour though.
  10. When we got there I sat by Carson. I gave him a hug. And then we waited. I would whisper to him, and squeeze his hand. I looked at the screen that showed his heartbeat. I kissed his forehead. And the screen went blank.

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