Ungrateful selfish girl that I am
Thread Topic: Ungrateful selfish girl that I am
-
My head is f---ed.
After my dissociative amnesia, Savior decided I’m allowed to take my abilify, which has been really helping making my head quiet. I feel clearer. But that clarity is making me think.
I wasn’t allowed to take it because it made me sleepy and she didn’t want me to sleep through the night without waking up to my alarms to check her diabetes or on the dog. Now I’m allowed to.
Who does the things she does to someone they love? I also feel like she puts a lot of misplaced blame on me. Her friend assaulted her allegedly out of jealousy of me, but I wasn’t even there and it is not my fault, it’s her ex friends. The person who attacked her.
And Who chokes someone when they say they’ll leave after you say you want them to leave? Who attacks you and then when you fight back, points to two measly scratch marks and says they’re scarred because of me, when I have five bruises on my left upper arm alone, never mind everything else.
She loses things and blames me for it. Attacks me saying I’m f---ing with her. But she’s f---ing with me. She’s so much older than me. She knows what she’s doing. Yes, her health is deteriorating, but she literally won’t allow me to leave as shown when she f---ing choked me.
She’s 47. I’m turning 23. She can’t expect me to be able to keep up with everything. She puts me down again and again and calls what she does to me “tough love”. Calls me a manipulator who doesn’t give a s--- about her. That I’m using her. Tells everyone how I depend so much on her like she’s some f---ing martyr. Says she only hits and screams because I don’t listen.
She better pray I don’t use my voice. Because a neighbor already said they had a recording of her hitting me and they’d call the police. They came out one time and asked if I needed help. The garage was open so I couldn’t say yes, because Savior is always watching.
I just have to play smart. -
Oh boy oh boy do I have the update for you
Apparently my parents said something about me being kidnapped by Savior (I wasn’t lol) and we got in a big “fight” where I was dropped off at midnight in the middle of the ghetto without any f---ing shoes in a city where glass is everywhere on the street
Luckily I found a deli where the owners were nice enough to let me stay in this room where I definitely have to get tested by the doctor for any diseases bc it doesn’t even have a light, but I appreciate the shelter and I started volunteering there in return for shelter and food as I had nothing
4 days pass and yesterday I bumped into a dude I will refer to as Psycho and psycho is infatuated with me. He found out through Savior a bit about what happened and told Savior. Savior has been looking for me and misses me. And honestly? I missed her too. She came in as it is Mower’s birthday and she just got in touch with Psycho. Apparently she found out info about this place that she’s texting me.
But her and I are doing a lot better. We fight and I say stupid s--- but you all know me by now. I’m hopefully returning back tomorrow, but I may have to stay in this room I will call the red room.
But yeah I’ve been living the fnaf dream past four days -
I really hope the talk tonight goes well. Savior and Mower want to talk to my boss about paying me now that I’m no longer there and back with Savior and Mower under the table.
I really really really like being at the deli and I really like working there and if he says no I won’t be allowed to. They said it’s because it’s a waste of their time and gas to drop me off for free and that then they’re taking advantage of me.
I hope it works out because it’d be a dream come true for me. I feel so happy there. I feel like just Pag, I’m no longer attached to someone else.
Savior even noticed the difference in my behavior there. But she credits it all to her, saying she’s the one who allowed me to learn to open up through the hitting and stuff….I didn’t like that. I feel I should get the credit. Because I’m the one coming out of my shell. And I chose to do it for myself. But I won’t burst her bubble. -
We were doing so well until last night. And now Savior got arrested and idk what to do
Post a reply as a guest or Log In
REMEMBER:
- Do not harass or insult other people. Treat others how you'd like to be treated.
View all 10 forum rules
- Do not harass or insult other people. Treat others how you'd like to be treated.
View all 10 forum rules
