Vent thread I'll probably forget about
Thread Topic: Vent thread I'll probably forget about
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I hate the idea of being just another person. I want to be great, even if I'm nothing but incredibly average
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I want to be the greatest, and if I'm not then I must be just another number, just someone who can be pushed to the side. I want to be the next best thing, the person up in lights, but instead I'm just some loser boy sitting in his room doodling and thinking up some new story I'll never actually make
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ew. ew. ew.
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ughhhh high school drama this year is unreal
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dude the tea spilled today is UNREAL
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and no, alexi, for once i'm not spilling it with you bc it's genuinely some insane s--- that i could not retell even if i wanted to
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anyways
turns out i was just being major insecure about my friend yelling at me, she was major overstimulated and burnt out and was at her breaking point. she came to my house to apologize today and we went to the lake to talk it out -
politics are stressing me out today
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goddamn it's just not my week
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im going through a jackass "i hate everyone" moment currently and it's messing with my head
and then it makes me so much more standoffish and rude than i normally am, and it's gotten bad enough that people are calling me out on it (as they should) -
im gonna take a nap, or at least just a stimulation break
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had a 2 hour nap and then watched Pop the Balloon with my mom lol
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kinda sucks how i've just abandoned my ambitions
i mean, i know i didn't abandon them, i just replaced them with other stuff like geography and possibly being a special needs teacher. It just sucks knowing i've just accepted that I'll never be a famous writer or an illustrator or an actor -
at the end of the day, I do that stuff for fun. It's rewarding, and I have a great time doing it, but it'll never be the big break like i thought it would be when i was younger
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last post before i go
it's darkly funny how me and Miguire both go through perfectionist spirals at the exact opposite times. I'm having one rn, she had one a month ago, I had one two months ago, and so on and so forth
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