Breathtaking Secrets | Comments

Ello ello ello, I'm back and I have a few thoughts on this new story. First off (I have no idea why but) ABBY IS HILARIOUS! I'm sorry but she's so deadpan and snooty it's funny to me. Not sure if that was your initial goal but, you got me into the story easily with her giving a tour (seriously that was fricken funny). Second, so far the main character is okay. My first impression of her is the typical everyday girl which is good in this case because everyone else seems to be a little nuts. Let me elaborate, Andy is kind of controling (in a funny way), Spike is... very different in terms of his physical appearence, Josh seems outspoken, and Bulk... well his name is enough don't you think? The houses and mini set-up of the academy is pretty nice. I like how it's done by Abby (funny and informative) also how you're setting up something pretty big. My only advice is to build-up the big things with smaller things. You can't build a tower without screws and bolts to hold it in place. I also have another suggestion, try to check for spelling before you post it. It wasn't terrible but sometimes I got confused reading dialogue or key parts in the story which isn't good. That's a minor note but otherwise, nice beginning. I hope you do great things with this, it's looking great!

Hi, singin123 (is there a 4? Gosh. I'm such an idiot to forget something that simple.) I stumbled upon your Goodbye story, and I got hooked. Then I found out you stopped writing it. Oh well. I do that too, and that's why I gave up writing. I felt like I was going nowhere. After I saw your writing, and I found out you're around my age (I'm 13), you became an inspiration for me to begin writing again. All I have to say is THANK YOU. You're a really great writer and keep up the good work!

Dies this mean you're canceling Forced To Be With Him? Sniffle sniffle.......But this is very good, please make part 2 soon!

thank you singin234 for making this quiz for me i love it so much and i love you to were all family here and you like the third sister i will never get

i like this :) just a precaution, this HAS been done before, so try to put your unique spin on it! it definantly has potential :) part 2!

I liked it ^_^ Haha Sparkles,it's a cute name :p Part 2 please!

I like the idea. Just work on your spelling! Part 2!!!!!!!!

you just need to fix your spellings and it would be a good read

I loved it huury up and make part 2