Do you want happiness GTQ?
- Locked due to inactivity on Aug 4, '16 4:20pm
Thread Topic: Do you want happiness GTQ?
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Do you want happiness GTQ? Do you want the secret I have used for years just to cope? It is very simple. Be happy.
Cute girl isn't interested? Be happy. Cat dies? Be happy. Fail exam? Be happy. Just be happy. No matter what happens, tell yourself that. Be happy be happy be happy. Smile as you spend another night alone, when you see the one girl who could make you happy across the globe in the same situation. Just smile.
Because the mind is quite a powerful thing. If you keep this up long enough, soon you will truly convince yourself you're happy. You can go to and from school or work or college and no matter what happened that day, you'll still be happy. Only in the early hours of the morning will the reality of it start to sink in, but you can just ignore this. And who's around to see your facade fall at 1 in the morning? No one, because god forbid they see the sad, self loathing person you are behind the mask. No, mask is not the right word.
Because it is not just a mask of a smile that you keep up, any one could do that. What this 'mind over body' stuff is true happiness, so long as you do not think about it. You can go about your day and be genuinely happy. With this new cheery demeanor you can have some friends again, maybe work towards a plan to be with that girl. You're actually happy. Until you are at home of course, at 1 in the morning, with no friends or cute girl to keep your mind off itself. That is when you start to remember how sad you are. You have time to think about everything in your life, and you remember why you shouldn't be happy. But of course the next morning comes with a whole new set of distractions and you can feel happy again.
It's 1 in the morning GTQ. I feel like dying. -
I agree with all of that except the cat dying one. My cat died back in April and I'm still not over it :/
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Telling yourself that you're happy when you're not is just lying to yourself. Lying is never the correct answer to anything. The truth is that you need to work on your problems and overcome them. Without work nothing is accomplished, that is simple science. You will always be sad until you do something about it.
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^But what if what's causing your sorrow is beyond your control?
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I agree with XLD. I never wear a mask.
If my sorrow is beyond my control I move one and seek happiness in other aspects. -
Could I have an example of something that is beyond control?
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Actually scratch that question, when I look at it it looks stupid. If it's out of your control than just move on. There is no point in being sad forever about something that you can't control. You can't control the fact that someone close to you dies, but you need to face the fact that they died. Not hide your emotions. Let it out, cry, be angry about it, or do whatever you need to do to get over it.
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^Fair point.
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Wow, how oblivious you are being...
I love it how Leah said that she doesn't wear a mask, when I clearly stated that it WASN'T a mask.
And XLD, your argument is very valid, but you leave out one crucial key. Happiness is a choice. You would be totally correct on having to work towards your goals, if you didn't think that it was the only way to be happy.
My girlfriend lives on the opposite side of the hemisphere. That kinda saddens me. Am I supposed to get over it? Move on? Seek happiness elsewhere? I'm sorry, but that sounds really heartless to me.
While there is nothing I can do about it for now, I choose to be happy. Happy for absolutely no reason until the day that I can do something about it. I don't have to smother myself in despair and live with a dark cloud over my head, and I don't have to give up and move on. Both of those options seem petty to me, and like a lazy way out. -
I do that. after such a long time, its hard to convince myself I'm happy though, everyone else is still fooled. but I know whats actually going on in my head, I cant fool myself anymore, and thats when it gets really hard. any single moment that I'm alone, not just at 1 in the morning, any tiny bit of time i have with myself, I can see the truth. And I hate it. Starting to need more than just little things to distract you, needing something to take your mind off of everything so you dont have to think about anything at all. and turn to drugs and alcohol and ruin your life for good. but at least you dont have to think about all those reasons to not be happy.
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barberbob2: If that is the only thing that is making you sad, then you need to get over yourself. Look on the bright side. At least you have a girlfriend. If you both really want to meet each other, then eventually you will. You should talk to other people about your problems, not keep your emotions hidden from everyone including yourself. You can hide the fact that a problem is there, but the problem will always be there until dealt with. I'm not saying the solution to everything is one answer, but if what your doing makes you want to die whenever you think about it, something isn't working.
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Holy crap this kid is oblivious.
XLD, if that were my only problem, I wouldn't be on the internet complaining about it. That was an example of the one I feel willing to use as an example. Further more, I don't need you telling me to get over myself. You don't even know me. Further more, responses like that are the reason more people don't go out and talk about their problems.
"if that is the only thing that is making you sad, then you need to get over yourself."
Gee, thanks for cheering me up kid. Glad I'm not depressed or that might actually be offensive.
You do not know how I handle my problems. You do not know my situations. You do not know how I think. You do not know me, and you never volunteered to learn. You jumped straight into telling me why what I'm doing is wrong. As someone who studied psychology for 3 years I've got to tell you, you would not make a good therapist.
Also, pay attention to what all I've said. I do have a plan to see her, so telling me to is redundant. I never said I had it worse, so pointing out that others do is pointless. And for the third time, 'mind over body' isn't suppressing depression. It is actually being happy because you will yourself to do so. In fact, being depressed all the time, or happy all the time is unhealthy, more unhealthy than feeling like crap. Finding a balance, no matter what that balance is, is what doctors strive for.
And the worst part of all of this is that you didn't even address the points I brought up in my last post. You're beating a dead horse. One that I've already addressed, but you apparently didn't comprehend.
So I say again, holy crap this kid is oblivious. -
I think you're overreacting a bit. I wasn't telling you how to run your life or anything. Just saying how I deal with my problems. You said you feel like dying, so I simply said how I don't feel like dying. Not really trying to start anything. If you're happy then good for you. If you're not then obviously you know everything about human psychology and can work it out on your own. It's just that how you deal with your problems would never work for me. And yeah, I don't know anything about you, but you also know absolutely nothing about me.
I said that the solution to everything isn't one answer. In other words, I could be wrong. And in this case I am wrong. Everyone handles their problems differently because everyone is different, obviously. Also it's pretty obvious that your only problem is some girl halfway around the world, I said "if". I'm not trying to argue whos method to happiness is best. Actually, I'm glad you aren't depressed. I never meant to be rude in any way. And I am never going to be a therapist, ever, so you don't have to worry about that. I know I didn't word what I said that well, I wasn't trying to insult or offend you. Sorry about being an oblivious idiot. -
I'm sorry. I went too far on my part and became the very thing I was so adamant to be against. It was as much my fault for only taking your posts at face value and reacting without thinking.
I'm sorry if I offended you. -
No, it's fine. I shouldn't have got in your business. I am also sorry.
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