Another Venting Thing
Thread Topic: Another Venting Thing
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I don’t know how it’s gone on this long
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In this thread, I said that I was going to kill myself before we moved, or at least shortly after
It’s been a f---ing year -
My whole life is literally after I go to bed.
I watch shows
I talk to my friends
I snap people
I go on gtq
Like no thank you I’m keeping my phone with me -
I would be fine with it,
But literally everything that keeps my stable has kinda disappeared. -
It’s scary, because i feel like my parents are supposed to be the ones who look out for me
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But they don’t. There have been so many times where I’ve blindly believed them, or where I thought they knew what was best for me.
They don’t. -
They don’t know what’s best for me, and that’s scary
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They’re f---ing supposed to know when I’m sad, or when I’m upset.
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And unless I cry, they don’t know. They can’t tell by my absence, or silence.
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They don’t have a f---ing clue until I try to kill myself. And then and only then do they say “Are you alright?”
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No, no I’m not “alright”.
What makes you think that I’m fine?
What? What is it?
Because I cry so hard that I can’t f---ing breath sometimes. -
Because I can’t put my life together, or fix what you broke.
I can’t “feel better”
You f---ing ruined my life. You can’t apologize or fix it. -
No matter how much you say sorry, or try to comfort me, it never changes the fact that we’re not in Texas anymore.
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All I need is to go back in time, to when I was happier and better.
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You know, I found out that someone in my grade is on drugs
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