I'm so tired
- Locked due to inactivity on Nov 12, '19 3:54am
Thread Topic: I'm so tired
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Today I got a roommate which makes me anxious but it's okay
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I thought I was okay but now I'm in a dark secluded corner in an unfamiliar building trying not to throw up or have a panic attack
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And now I just got done talking to Disability Services and I'm getting a single room
I feel really bad 🙃 and also like a disabled person
I am not disabled
But I do have a problem
OCD ruins my life. I wish I could just deal with it and not have a f---ing panic attack -
hey, love you
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thank you
I missed both my classes today and I want to just cry I'm so useless -
so I'm in disability services, right? talking to the lady about my illness (she keeps referring to it as a disability which makes me sad but in this context it is disabling) and after we fax the required documents to my therapist to have her sign, basically saying what accommodations I need for my illness, I ask if I can use one of their testing rooms because my room is causing me too much stress and I am very, very behind on homework due to all the s---e I've dealt with these past few days
they oblige and put me in a testing room with a large window, seemingly very nice at first except for the fact that the door won't stay open like it's supposed to. that's okay, I like it closed anyway. I sit down and notice one of the chairs is broken. that's fine, I switch it out for another chair. no big deal.
I'm working away on my laptop then realize I need to turn the light on so I can write in my notebook. I get up and turn on the light then sit back down. I'm writing in my notebook for a few seconds when the light randomly turns off. I get up and turn it back on, sit down, and it turns off again. also, it is very very hot in that room. I am sweating profusely. the lady comes back in and updates me on everything going on in my case and asks if she can do anything for me. I tell her it's hot in there and she says she'll bring me a table fan. the light keeps going on and off periodically on its own the entire time. she comes back in with a fan but there's no outlet by the other desk so she has to set it on the floor. she does so and turns it on. it feels nice but as it's moving horizontally, it's making a terrible noise. I say it's fine. that doesn't bother me that much. light still going off and on every 30 seconds or so. suddenly, without anyone touching it, the fan stops moving and stops making the horrible sound. okay then. the lady makes a joke about the room being possessed. if I were superstitious, I wouldn't doubt it. she goes to leave when suddenly I notice something on the ceiling.
there appears to be a leak in one of the ceiling tiles. it is brown and literally BULGING, with a crack in it looking like the entire thing could burst open at any moment. the lady calls her assistant after I point out the weird thing on the ceiling and tells the assistant to call maintenance and tell them it looks like an alien is being birthed from the ceiling. I can't stop laughing.
the lady escorts me to a different room. much smaller, but the chairs are both super comfy and functional. there's even a white noise machine. I love those things like a lot. I want one or like five (hint hint Jonathon). the room is okay. I start working but then I need to use the restroom. I go out into the hall and wander around looking for a restroom. there is one women's restroom so I spent some time searching for a men's restroom. usually if there's one, you can expect to find the other, right? wrong. maybe there is one hidden around somewhere but after some wandering I could not find it so I just used the women's. for some reason there was a large comfy leather chair in there. okay then.
today has been an adventure. I really need to do my homework but I wanted to share this experience because I've just been cracking up -
When aliens take over the earth it's going to be your fault because you didn't stop them from hatching
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You're already here so I guess it was too late anyway
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D:
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I'm not a bad student, I'm just sick. Really sick. This f---ing professor acting like everything revolves around her class. I'm f---ing trying. I'm trying.
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