Hello
- Locked due to inactivity on Aug 4, '16 4:35pm
Thread Topic: Hello
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On top of it all this never goes away, I can't vent out my anger only forget it. When I vent, more despair comes in than what I can let out. Imagine drowinging in the midst of a pool, you thrash to get air... you can get a little quarter breath of air but lose half a breath trying to get the quarter. You die faster thrashing around...
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*puts my head in my hands with a sigh* In two weeks I really haven't left a mark on your lives. How it should be is I'm just another person who popped in and dissappeared.
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Don't thrash. You let it out a little at a time until you feel like you have that hope, that strength to push forward. The courage to live when all is lost. That switch in your brain flips and you make the choice. I wont stop you from doing what you do. I'm just trying to encourage you to let it go and feel all the feeling that you feel when your happy. Because were does sadness get you?
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When I'm happy I make more mistakes. So unless I forcefully let myself go, then I'm always emotionelss or dying. It's how I live, the only exception is love because... I really don't understand it myself, it's a wierd feeling.
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But when your happy you don't have to worry about those mistakes. Because all you want is that one goal we all want to achieve: Happiness. Love is still happiness. Love is that one thing you have when you feel a warm feeling inside. It makes you happy. No matter what, you can't stop happiness.
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haha it's funny how you say this s---
yet you make me feel like I'm trash
lmao -
I'm content with no emotions if it means the joy of someone else around me.
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How I act is for the betterment of those around me. It's just how I am, I don't expect a soul to be like me.
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Ghetto- I'm sorry. I don't really know why I did what I did but I already know my forgiveness wont change how you feel. But I don't know what to say anymore. I'm trying to understand why I did it but I can't. I still like you like I did before but I know that wont help me.
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My avatar is that of an ODST. I give recognition to the idea of ODSTs because they in their own inspire me. They can enter a suicidal situation and have no complaints, all they care is about what's right and their comrades. To me... being able to push everything aside to make sure the right thing is fone is just... amazing. That is the same type of person I've tried to make myself be, yet I hurt from the emotions I can't stop.
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emarsh- But that is what I'm trying to tell you. Your you. That's not ever gonna change. Your feelings make others feel the same. Feelings are like an infection. It spreads. Just try being happy.
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You know how I manage to drown out my hatred is by forgiving what people do. Nobody is immune from that, because if you can't forgive then you can't be helped. *glances at ghetto* no offense of course.
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Gotta give it to you shadow, you really are wearing me down. It gets harder and harder to argue with you no matter how far I go down the wrong road XD. Yet as I was once told, 'no matter how far you go down the wrong road, you can always turn back'. I might give happiness a few more tries but I fear there isn't much to do at the moment, what I'm saying is what I actually believe. I already know what I nees to do to fix myself butnit is going to take a lot of time...
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No one can promise you forgiveness but you can earn it through letting all those feeling go.
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fellings*
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