I'm so happy.
- Locked due to inactivity on Aug 4, '16 4:33pm
Thread Topic: I'm so happy.
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It's raining, I love the sound, the smell, the clouds.
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Agreed. Same.
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Yayy! Hi, Cody! How's life? C:
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It is pouring were I live. The streets are flooded and I feel like I am in a major city. It is amazing
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Its great. Its raining here, which I like. Got to go soon though. See you when I see you Q.Cheese.
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It's raining hard, there's no flood but it's raining hard.
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Ok, Cody
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Yeah, anyways how are you?
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I'm good, how about you?
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Goodish, I need to finish this poem for school but my dad went to bed so I don't have anyone to go over it with.
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Oh, I would help you but I'm not good with poetry.
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It's okay.
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You could type it on here,I'm great with poetry(sorry to barge in like this)
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Oh, ok.
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Tis okay.
So I have to set all my previous stuff down, limits, and focuses before I can give you the actual poem.
What my English teacher told us to write about was a refugee of our own creation. and how there life was turned inside out.
Our main focuses are creative language, strong word choice, figurative language, and content to a degree.
My basic temple that I had to full out looks like this.
Name: kinda
Age: Unknown
gender: female
Where did she come from? Afghanistan
Why did she flee? Lack of rights
Where did she flee to? A refugee camp
Scene: she is battling both physical, and emotional battles as she crosses her country in hopes of reaching her destination.
Nationality: Afghanistan???.
Religion Christianity
Why did she flee? Religions persecution, fear, lack of rights
What hardships did she face in her country? Taliban government, persecution, anguish
What was it like for her after she fled? Her life has been flipped upsidedown. She has left behind her past in hopes of freedom. But this freedom makes her feel ,ore alive the she ever had before.
Where did she go? After fleeing to a plane she was flown to a refugee camp in ( country unspecified )
where did she find help? With a group of missionarys who were sheltering refugees
How was her life flipped inside out? It always was, ever since she was little she was torn from a normal life and she was under persecution.
that was my pre write.
This is my rough draft progression of my poem.
#1
Chasing freedom
So far away,
To be rid of this label
Afghani,
To be free to follow
Christianity,
My freedom is nearing
but the distance between,
the past and me
is not far enough stil,
Back were women like me
had lack of rights,
And children were wary
Not any more,
My past is dead,
all that remains
is this line,
between me and my sanity
Freedom.
I am trying to put more indirect information into it without messing up the flow of the poem, I ,raked some areas where I might put somemore information and so I have, but this one needs help.
Chasing freedom
So far away,
To be rid of this label
Afghani,
To be free to follow
Christianity,
Carrsed feet
fatigue overwhelming,...
I have hope
that souls are coming
to set me free
From this tie that binds me....
the past is fading
freedom is vast
my future, limitless...
My freedom is nearing
but the distance between,
the past and me
is not far enough stil,
Back were women like me
had lack of rights,
And children were wary
Not any more,
My past is dead,
all that remains
is this line,
between me and my sanity
Freedom.
So yeah, I am looking to place more content into the poem but I am failing miserably
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