Musing's of a Strange Poet
Thread Topic: Musing's of a Strange Poet
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Reflection
Written: December 13th, 2021
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On days like this I reflect;
Realize the past is gone and future is a pen drop away.
I realize;
I am worth more than my mind portrays.
I am greater than the person I was yesterday;
And I can choose to be better.
Love unconditionally;
But let boundaries continue to exist.
I realize;
There is a time, and place.
That things will eventually fall into place.
That I am more than the thoughts that wrestle with my mind. -
Untitled
Written: October 26th, 2022
TW: Poem deals with anxiety/depression
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I wish that on night like these,
My heart would stop racing.
That my fingernails would no longer find their home,
Between the edges of my teeth,
Chewed beyond repair.
I wish that my soul would stop to breathe,
And realize that I am also worthy of a break.
That all of my waking moments do not have to be spent sitting on the edge,
Watching my feet dangling as I can barely hold on. -
Untitled
Written: March 2023
A poem that despite my parents flaws, and past mistakes they do have characteristics I wish I had.
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I wish that I had the faith of my mother,
And the strength of my father.
The way my mother walks through a battlefield,
And still manages to elude an aura of grace.
The stories that are hidden behind her eyes,
But never falters her beliefs.
The way my father lifted weights off our shoulders,
And never seemed to be fazed.
The world crushed upon his shoulders,
But he still managed to get up with a smile.
I wish I carried such a faith, and strength,
That like them, I would hope to be known for my acts of kindness. -
Untitled
Written: July 23rd, 2023
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Sometimes,
I wish things would have turned out differently.
That my hands could grasp solidarity;
Instead of crumbling debris.
Watching eroded soil slip through my fingers,
Just as fast as I can climb.
Waiting for the moment,
Where my body can collapse in a heap of self-gratitude;
And the words from my lips are to love myself,
Instead of the shards seething with imperfections. -
Untitled
Written: October 5th, 2023
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Sometimes,
I wish the words of others would not hang on my coat-tails.
Flying away to be heard by whispering trees, and babbling brooks.
I am reminded that, even if someone is close to you,
Their actions are your own.
I am reminded of my sibling,
When I would have to take the blows,
And it would ruin friendships that could last a millennium.
I am reminded that even if things aren't true,
If they come from someone close to you,
They are. -
Nostalgia
Written: December 14th, 2023
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One day,
When the cold stops eating at my bones,
And frost recedes from my finger-tips
I hope to find solace in the songs we used to sing in my youth.
The strum of guitar strings,
And the chorus of old bluegrass tunes.
In times like these,
I think of you.
Pulling magic from nothingness,
Just to make sure time stood still;
Even if but for a moment. -
Ghost
Written: December 17th, 2023
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If the ghost in my soul,
Could write on my fractured walls,
It would speak of the depths of the ocean.
The point of no return,
Where the sea starts to compress in on itself,
And only monsters lurk in the midst.
It would speak of flowers,
That wilted, once in the presence of rain.
Petals that folded upon themselves,
Succumbing to the force of nature's simplicities. -
Generational Rage
Written: January 26th, 2024
This is hands down on of my favorite poems I have written to date.
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Words cannot even begin to explain
Generational rage.
Knowing my parents had to struggle;
Making ends meet through pawn shops,
And borrowed goods.
Watching them grow old in front of me;
As I promise myself I will be the last.
The last in a line of men and women who worked hard,
But had nothing to show for it
Other than brittle bones,
And broken aptitude.
Men and women who worked themselves to the core,
Just for others to say, "You haven't tried."
When it comes down to it,
I will be the one to break the mold.
No longer will there be nights of struggle,
And wondering if I am good enough in the eyes of others.
I will stand tall with the perseverance of my father,
And I will grow in strength with wisdom of my mother.
Just to end,
The generational rage. -
An Ode to my Best Friend
Written: March 16th, 2024
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My best friend,
Showed up at a pivotal time in my life.
She was like a person I had known;
Before this life-time.
Behind her eyes,
Was the wisdom of someone far beyond her years;
And a known knack for being my grounding place.
She would pull me back from my darkest places,
Whilst she dealt with closeted demons of her own.
Dealing with the burden of generations on her shoulders,
While paving a path toward the future she dreamed of.
Watching her grow,
And the weight off her shoulders be slowly lifted;
Has been a blessing of its own accord.
Watching her build,
And grow into the family that I know she wish she had when she was younger.
My best friend;
The one that is always strong,
And steadfast;
Is finally getting the peace in her life, that she deserves.
And I couldn't be more proud of her accomplishments. -
Prayer Closet
Written: March 30th, 2024
My mom is a Christian (albeit I am not), and she wanted me to write a poem for her. This is the result.
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When my mother feels defeated,
She goes into her bedroom.
The only place in her house
That radiates peace.
A place she calls her "prayer closet".
It is a war room,
Decorated with prayers,
And the mannerisms of a woman held by grace.
On days that my mother feels lost
She goes here;
Places her knees on hollowed ground
And folds her hand in prayer.
She talks to God,
About things no one else knows.
Leaves her problems at his feet,
And bows her head in respect.
This is what she calls her "prayer closet".
I call it her sanctuary.
A room of peace,
Where she can go,
When she feels the world is too heavy.
A room where all of her problems melt away,
Even if but for a moment
In God's grace. -
Untitled
Written: April 29th, 2024
My grandmother wanted me to write a poem for her about the current relationship she was in. I was finding it difficult because she had lost her husband and wanted to be in a relationship with someone else around 2 years later (which I get). I just didn't know how to write a love poem for her, and this is the poem that came from that situation.
I did end up writing her a poem, which I will post once I find it.
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I feel bad,
Because I cannot write a poem
About something I have not experienced.
I can write about grief,
Or how the rain feels on my skin.
I could write about the little girl I once was,
Or the person I am today.
I can paint images of my emotions,
Behind a wall of text so vivid,
That you would be able to see my heart on a page.
But out of all of this,
I cannot write about an experience that isn't mine.
My words feel blank,
Empty.
Without purpose or prose.
I wish,
I could write the things you want me to write. -
"To Know is to Love"
Written: May 6th, 2024
This was the poem I ended up writing my grandmother.
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All of my life,
I have heard the phrase,
"To know is to love".
I have always pondered that phrase,
Because I never understood it.
Now, as I grow older;
And I have watched everything around me grow,
I have realized that love has many forms.
Whether that be a bond between a mother and daughter,
Or friends that stay by your side unconditionally.
They say,
"To know is to love".
And at the end of that day,
I am glad that I know you. -
Untitled
Written: August 29th, 2021
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Sometimes the day ages backwards.
As I get older;
I find myself in memories long past.
Wanting to go back,
Even though I am better off where I am now.
Sometimes the day moves slower;
As if my mind makes time an auditory and physical hallucination.
A concept that isn't exactly set in stone.
It makes me think,
Maybe...
I am limitless and unexpendable.
But those are just the thoughts of a reckless mind.
Sometimes I am reminded of you;
In the smallest things I do.
Making a cup of coffee,
Or sitting down to turn the pages of a book. -
Untitled
Written: August 2nd, 2024
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Darling,
I wish I carried your strength.
You wear it like a badge,
Whilst others are casting stones upon your name.
I wish that I could grasp your hands,
Seeking solidarity,
But I keep fumbling,
And nothing but air passes through my fingers.
My body is shiftless,
But yours is ever-moving with the time.
My soul cries for a reprieve from my reckless thoughts,
And wants the type of strength you have to keep carrying on. -
Things I Love About My Dad
Written: September 9th, 2024
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I love when we call,
And he is excited to tell me about the things he has traded.
Or how we reminisce about movies we watched together when I was a child.
Whenever I call,
And he is just happy to hear my voice,
And I his.
I adore the love that radiates from him,
Showing me that regardless of the passage of time,
I will always be his daughter.
The man who taught me that humbleness is not weakness,
And that if a man is in need and you are able,
To help selflessly.
I love the moments we share as I get older,
And I realize that time is a precious commodity.
I only wish I had more of it.
I love you, Dad.
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