The Paper Man
- Locked due to inactivity on Nov 13, '21 3:54am
Thread Topic: The Paper Man
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It’s not like he did anything wrong… We sit together and watch a movie, happily giving commentary and enjoying our company. We play games together, play pretend, chat, vent, info dump, and more. When spending time with him, I feel fulfilled, but once I leave, I find I’m covered in paper cuts. The problem, you see, is that he is made of paper, and I am made of flesh. It’s not his fault he’s made of paper, but… I am covered from head to toe in paper cuts, and I don’t know how to fix that.
Every now and then, I’ll acknowledge the paper cuts and ask him to wear something to cover his paper skin, but when I do, he spends more time with those that are made of paper, wood, or tin, because they don’t ask that of him, and I am left alone with guilt and anxiety over trying to change him. Unable to form a connection with the people of tin and wood he spends time with, or the people of flesh that won’t hurt me, I decide to allow him to hug me without the sweater.
Sometimes I wear the sweater, I cover my own skin to protect myself. That makes him feel like a monster, which I’m trying to convince him he isn’t. Most of the time it works, but we’re more distant from each other, and sometimes it’s too warm to wear a sweater, and sometimes his paper cuts through it, and sometimes he thinks if my sweater protects me from him, it can protect me from his friends of paper, wood, and tin. Sometimes I do make a friend of flesh, or even a friend of tin, but eventually he creates a connection with them. They go from my friends, to our friends, to his friends, to his tin men. Then when they give him splinters and he gives them scratches, he’ll vent to me about them, until we leave them behind, or he goes back to them when I’m not ready to trust them. Now, I’m not ready to trust him.
But those of flesh and bone can hit me and yell and leave. They hate me before I can even begin, or they pity me when they don’t know me. Those of flesh see my paper cuts and ask me if I’m okay, and those of paper of wood ignore them.
I used to have a wooden friend, at first the wood was polished and beautiful and was comfortable to hug. Then over time she splintered from friends of paper, wood, and tin that hurt her, and eventually I left her, because being covered in burns and paper cuts and splinters was too much to handle.
I’m left with this paper friend, who I want to love, but don’t. I don’t trust him, I don’t love him, no matter how hard I try, even though I feel happy with him, and he seems to love me, and he validates me, and he treats me better than any friend before… I don’t love him, and I’m tired of coming home covered in paper cuts. He hasn’t done anything wrong, and I don’t think I have either, but it isn’t right of me to remain friends with someone who doesn’t fulfill me. It’s not right to mislead him, nor is it right to put myself through this just out of fear of being alone. -
This is amazing and really powerful, your use of symbolism is so well put :0
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Thank you!
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