Allissa is Bored 1: Some of my favorite quotes :)

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Hey guys, welcome to the first ever episode of Allissa is Bored. (I totally feel like Ian right now! ^-^) So today, I will be sharing some of my favorite quotes with you. :D

:S I'm kinda nervous because I'm afraid that this will turn out to be total crapola. Well, I thought these quotes were funny... I hope you do too. :P

Created by: Firey_Soul

  1. "When life gives you lemons, throw them at someone at go back to bed." -me... or maybe I just heard it somewhere. I can't remember. xD
  2. "Come to the back of the church kids, I have a leetle surprise for you." -that priest whose name I can't remember. xP Okay, so on Christmas Eve, I went to church with my family and the priest seriously said that! I know he wasn't trying to be a creep, but that sounded SO awful to me... I couldn't help but giggle right there. I haven't been to church ever since. xD
  3. "Shut up, we are in a holy place! Literally... there's holes everywhere." -Stardust's brother "That's what she said!" -me "Do not make 'that's what she said' jokes in the church!" -Stardust ... Yes, this was the same day. A lot of memorable things happened. This is proof that we can't act mature for one freaking second!
  4. "Ooh, this is not a pretty sight! Everything's loose and flapping around!" -my favorite quote from scary movie 4
  5. "Live longer, let me sleep!" -this came from my happy bunny calender. It was on my month, September. That quote is perfect for me! :P
  6. "So Usher got some drugs from Mexico..." -Justin Bieber/ Ian
  7. "Wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle... aw, it fell off. :(" -me. Haha, yeah soooo... I was making cookies and playing with the dough while singing "Sexy and I know it" I made this snake thingy and it broke while I was singing the "wigggle wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle" part, ok?
  8. "I'm really cute, so no one will ever suspect that I have the mind of a murderer." -me ;)
  9. "Ian left his ballsack in the car and he's making me go get it! >.>" -Anthony.
  10. "Friendship is like peeing in your pants. Everyone can see it, but only you can feel it's true warmth." -I have no clue who said this!
  11. "I love you with all my butt... I would say my heart, but my butt is bigger. x3" -you can find this quote on my wattpad profile!
  12. "Never get jealous when you see your ex with someone else, just remember, our parents taught us to give our used toys to the less fortunate." -another quote you can find on my wattpad profile. :P
  13. "Nobody dies a virgin, 'cause in the end, life f---s us all." -don't know who said it, but they're awesome. :P
  14. "May I stroke your glabella?" -Dan
  15. "I look like a f---ing raisin! Dx" -Dan
  16. "I apologise for the failure of my belt, but don't pretend you don't enjoy it. xD" -Dan
  17. "That was probably the most disgusting thing I've ever put in my mouth... don't look at me like that." -Dan. Oh, he just ate a freaking crumpet with a s--- ton of butter, you pervert! xD
  18. Alrighty, well that's about it for the quotes. I have a lot more, but they're too innapropriate for gotoquiz. xP The last thing I want to do is get my profile deleted. :S Anywho, I hope these quotes made you laugh, or at least smile. I'll be posting "Allissa is Bored 2" whenever. ;D
  19. Oh by the way, if you have any funny or witty quotes that you would like to share, feel free to do so. :D
  20. Studies show that those who comment are much more likely to be loved by Firey_Soul than those who don't.

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