So um *hesitant posting this because it involves 'feelings'*
- Locked due to inactivity on Aug 4, '16 4:17pm
Thread Topic: So um *hesitant posting this because it involves 'feelings'*
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Which happens to be a 11-12s class (we're 10ers)Our class lacks boys, has a s---eload of girls, their class lacks girls and has a s---eload of girls, hence the mix.
The teacher told us to pick a partner and you'll be dancing with them the entire time, every class you do the two step, you dance with them.
in that 11-12 class ironically has my two friends, whom I will refer to as 'A' and 'S' my friend originally wanted to dance with S out of spite because she knows I ...
...
*has trouble wording it*
she knows I've grown quite fond of him >.>' but A is an awesome dude too, but we shouldn't dance together cause we'd piss off the whole class (animal noises. bawk bawk quack ARF WOOF we do that a lot to piss people off)
I asked S before my friend could xP
Before anyone asks, 'S' is an old crush I was hoping to have grown out of because he's a good friend of mine, and we're working on a game project together (I'm his concept artist for the video game he and his friends are making)
It's been a f---ing year. I ignore my feelings all the time, why hasn't this mutherfuking blown over yet? they usually f--- off around the 6 month - 1 year range if I actually liked them. S is a good guy, I know him fairly well, especially since he got his heart broken a little while ago and gave up love then, which is why I don't want to say anything, I KNOW I don't have a chance and I want to spare his feelings because even though it's been years, what the girl did was a s--- move, I don't want to be the repeater (even though I know fully well that I'm not like that) because somewhere deep down I fear rejection and kick myself to the point that I feel I'm a pathetic excuse of womankind, f--- I'm not even pretty. Why the hell am I here?
S pisses me off, I don' know why but he pisses me off.
So what the f---'s wrong with me? Why do I feel this sh1te excuse of an emotion? I'm supposed to be the one chick from the group who feels nothing for anyone, so why me? Goddamnit.
Anyone who read this whole thing, kudos to you and I'm sorry to have wasted your time with my rambles of emotional frustration.
tl;dr (too long didn't read) I hate myself, especially the part of my brain that chooses the douches I 'fall in love with'even though S is legit a good guy with a bright future and my parents like him too
So here I'm just...being honest with myself. I don't expect anyone to read about my s---ty approach towards emotions. Hell nothing I'm typing right now makes sense. It just sounds like a spiteful, honest-to-self emo faggotry rant.
Also, hello Dating and Relationships forum, I sure as hell don't miss you but it's been a while since I've posted a goddamn thread in here, how many sex trolls have I missed? -
Good god it's longer than I anticipated. Sorry!
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Pick S. A is your friend and he will understand.
Something inside you is telling you S. And if S is what your heart is telling you to do, then do it. I know you try to be emotionless, but lets face it, no one truely is emotionless. Having feelings for someone, even confusing feelings, is a healthy and good thing. It shows that you're maturing, and that you're a human being. :)
Follow your gut instict Carri. It'll take you where you want to be. -
No love for teh Carris except from Bobby, ilu bro
My gut instinct is telling me to keep quiet. I already asked to dance with him and he said yes. (i did the yey dance in front of him)
He doesn't really suspect me liking him because I'm constantly doing bold things, but I guess you're right, it's impossible to be emotionless unless you're a machine of some sort. -
......I actually like A :3
He seems fun. But, that's for me xD
For you....S seems like the one. If it hasn't blown over, it's for a reason: how is it that in your paragraph, you managed to say lots of nice things about him? Hmm....you don't do that all that often, do you?
It's a sign, Tingy. Satanists can believe in miracles, can't they? Or what about....liking someone? I'm sure you can handle it, strong as you are.
Stop listening to you brain, listen to your heart. Don't categorize yourself as something you were, but aren't anymore. That's other people's job.
...Your job? To prove them wrong. :) -
A is awesome, he truly is and his girlfriend is a whore that doesn't deserve him.
I do that very often for my friends but not to the rest.
I'm not that kind of Satanist, of course I do xP my religion just says make up your own morals, it doesn't bring that into accounts, I just don't believe miracles happen as often as people think they do. and I dislike liking people.
Love how I preach that but never practice it, but I'm doing both and compromising, I keep it in a safe distance and I don't like complicating things and we can stay friends :P it'd awkward up our friends circle and I'm quite content with the situation, I just wish the feeling would pass. -
JuliaIsJinxed NewbieOh boy.
Honestly, from the way you talked about him, its pretty clear that you like S, even though you can't admit it to yourself for some strange reason.
So dance with him. Be merry. Live it up. Talk to him.
And if you hang out in your "friends group" a lot, then you should make a point of spending time with him SPECIFICALLY and maybe say things about how much you enjoy hanging out with him (even though you can barely say that to yourself... XD)
Then maybe he'll get the hint and things will go more smoothly than you'd expect.
I know how it feels to hate liking people. In fact, I've been in a similar situation before. It sucks, I'm not gonna sugar coat it.
But, then again he could be one of those guys that surprises you. The guy I've been "crushing on" (bleh.. hate that phrase) surprised me! Hell, he CREEPED ME OUT last year and I avoided him. But now, we're friends, my family has met him and loves him, and I'm in that awkward in between stage with him. (Actually I could use some advice about it if you want to read my thread...I'd appreciate it [: )
BUT ANYWAYS. My point is.. Pursue this "S" thing. Because you never know who could surprise you (; -
I like him, I admit it to myself, and my friends know (mainly cause I let it slip at one point but other than that, I keep a very steady pa-pa-pa-pokerface.) but I don't want to like him, that's the problem. The dude's a good friend and I don't want to scare him away, that's not a risk I'm willing to take.
no one in my friends group hang out outside of school, no one has the time to, Le's dad's a teacher and barates her to work all the time, Ja's parents think she's a delinquent and forces her to stay home all the time and not let her hang out with her friends unless it's me, C just lives too far away, I'm constantly trying to up my own visual art skills and trying to get ahead in my studies and S spends every waking moment studying and working on his video game project so he rarely does anything outside of school, the dude never gets anything under 85, he gives a f--- about school and I'm a artistic freak, that's not the best matchup and I don't see it happening anytime soon, as far as I know, he considers me a friend and I'm glad he does.
I'm not 'pursuing' my guy friend and that's all, relationships are not my thing, I'm not girlfriend material and we're both not into, it's my 'heart' that's not agreeing with me. We're just rational people.
besides...he wants to be a doctor, I want to be a Artist. Too much of a difference.
I posted here to let out my frustrations, not to get advice on how to get a boyfriend no matter how much you guys want me to and become the mushy girl you all want me to be -.-' I'm perfectly content as a manipulative b----. -
._. went against what I said.
I wound up sitting in the cafeteria and talking to him for about 3 and a half hours until his ride showed up ._.'
and he gave me his poppy lol -
three and a half hours after school**
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JuliaIsJinxed Newbiewhoa whoa whoa. Caaaalm yourself. Just tried to give you advice that may be helpful. Don't take out your frustration with your clusterf--- of a situation on me. I've got my own problems... I didn't have to try to be helpful. But I did. Maybe try to be grateful next time, even if you don't like what people have to say...
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It's not a clusterf--- to me really, it only looks like one to you :P I didn't even freak on you lol
I am grateful, I just don't show it :P I'm always grateful when someone gives enough f--- to say something.
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