The dork/nerd quiz

So, we've reached the point of saturation with the internet (at least, in America). This alone has raised the bar for dorkiness. Fifteen years ago, typing 70 WPM meant you probably had no chance of having sex, ever. Now, it just makes you more efficient.

However, there is a point [hard to define as it may be] where your comfort with technology has gone too far. Perhaps you crossed it when you ordered pizza delivery online, to avoid leaving your World of Warcraft game. Maybe it was when you signed up for MySpace and decided to learn HTML "just to pimp out my profile". Whatever it was, you're on a one-way street now, sucker. Best take the ol' quiz and find out just how doomed you are.

What is your age?
Under 18 Years Old
18 to 24 Years Old
25 to 30 Years Old
31 to 40 Years Old
41 to 50 Years Old
51 to 60 Years Old
Over 60 Years Old
What is your gender?
Do you consider yourself competent on a PC?
I don't use a PC.
I'm below average.
I'm about average.
I'm above average.
I far above average.
My job involves advanced programming. All your base are belong to me.
If you played sports, were you any good at them?
I didn't play sports. Ever.
I played recreationally, but not anything serious.
I played competitively [in a league], but I sucked.
I played competitively and held my own.
I have recieved a scholarship or won awards for my sporting achievements.
Have you ever played computer/video games for a period of time longer than an hour straight?
I don't play video games.
I play video games, but only seldom.
Yeah, maybe a few times.
I have stepped away from the keyboard and discovered I had a beard.
Do you use online abbreviations?
Only to mock.
<4n Yu0 |234D +h|$?
What the hell?
Yes, but I didn't like it.
0MG, |20x0|2$!!
Have you ever engaged in a lengthly online debate on forums and felt satisfaction at winning?
I don't use online forums.
I use forums, but don't argue on them.
I use forms, and argue for fun.
I type three page responses to anonymous posts. My response has pages and pages of primary research and links to new sites that validate my claims. Other forum members refer to me as "Balthar, the destroyer of nubs". I derive sexual satisfaction from w
Have you ever written code?
No, I don't know what that is.
No, but I know what it is and have an idea of what goes on.
Yeah, but nothing usable.
Yeah, and I've gotten useable results.
Yeah, earlier this morning I wrote an app that synchs my alarm clock up to my coffeepot and toaster to allow me to sleep longer.
Are you good in social settings?
Yes! I listen well and am happy being the center of attention.
I'm a good listener, I suppose.
Eh, not really. I tend to kill conversations...
I'm extremely awkward. I avoid doing anything other than listening for the sake of not immediately forcing the conversation to end.
I have accepted that I cannot be trusted to not ruin a social event, and no longer attend them.
Have you sincerely attempted to flirt with someone of the opposite sex via the internet?
Uhhhh, no.
Maybe. Will people I know find out about this?
I have hacked to put me in the first page of results for the search terms "sexy" and "muscular", though I know I am neither.
Have you ever played a board game that involved more than one die?
What? No. Wait, does Yahtzee count?
Can't recall.
I played Risk as a kid, I think...
Yeah, I play RTS games regularly.
Yes. I have one room in my basement for the playing of D&D, and another for all my manuals. I carry a twenty sided die in my pocket for luck and occasionally use it to aid in tough decisions.
Are you successful with the opposite sex?
Yeah. I don't want to brag, but nuns sometimes break the habit for a piece of me, if you GET what I MEAN.
I do alright.
I'm a little less prolific in my exploits than most. I lie to myself and say it's because I'm choosy.
I have a tendency to get nervous and spit when I'm attempting flirting.
I have given up on the opposite sex. I'm gay/experimenting with asexual division as a means of reproducing.

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