RainCandy's Vent Thread
Thread Topic: RainCandy's Vent Thread
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I need a hug.
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I had a relapse and spent a bunch of money just now. Didn't necessarily need any of it.
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What are you doing, Cloud?
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Just messing up like I usually do. I'm going to get in trouble.
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I feel like I'm falling into a void.
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I have to be strong. I have work tomorrow.
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I'm tired of being strong because apparently what I'm doing as is isn't enough for my parents.
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I feel alone.
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Getting rid of my friend... Now I just feel ridiculous for ever thinking they'd be a good friend.
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But I still don't feel much regarding them specifically. After everything they did to me, I feel nothing.
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One of the alters immediately cut them off after the last time they said something off-putting. I'm glad they did. I would've felt too guilty to do that.
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What they didn't know is that he was also a protector. They claimed that they were doing it because a protector alter was fronting. Okay? That doesn't give you the right to blow up at me for existing and not doing okay???
Shiva is my protector alter, and he was not having that. Unforgiving, he does what he has to do. I appreciate him. He doesn't let feelings get in the way of making choices. -
He said "You're welcome. Take care of yourself more."
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Sometimes I can hear the other alters thoughts. It's like standing there and listening to a conversation between other people, or having a conversation 1 on 1 with someone else.
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I'm glad we don't have anything to do after dinner tonight. I just want to be alone.
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