1. What is your age? Under 18 Years Old 18 to 24 Years Old 25 to 30 Years Old 31 to 40 Years Old 41 to 50 Years Old 51 to 60 Years Old Over 60 Years Old 2. What is your gender? Male Female 3. Do you love killing people? HELLZ YEAH!! DOOM TO YOU ALL!! Somewhat, but I usually only do if it will behoove me in some way Not particularly :O!! 4. If you were fighting someone, would you be likely to brutally mangle them in completely unneccessary ways? HELLZ YEAH I wouldn't be particularly likely to No, I would fight efficiently and not create a mess I probably would get my arse kicked regardless 5. If you were to kill someone, would you proceed to eat them, or otherwise use their corpse for some productive purpose? Yeah man that's why I killed him in the first place!! Sure, it would be a shame to waste a perfectly good corpse Probably not :O!! 6. How often can you be found eating something? Whenever I can find food About average At times in which I'm not busy, which is rare *Looks up from hot dog* Hmm? 7. Is there anyone whom you consider your "kin", so to speak, that the average person would not? All members of my species Any sentient beings with similar motives or personalities to my own Other Several or all of the above No, just my family No, I do not consider anyone my kin 8. Humans, they... Are ignorant Are delicious Serve morals which I cannot reasonably be expected to conform to, escpecially when dealing with them All of the above Are worth enough not to be haphazardly torn to shreds Are reawwy, reawwy gwate :} 9. When visiting your refridgerator, must you constantly shuffle your jars of pickled livers about in order to reach your jars of pickled hearts? YES, it's so irritating No, I don't pickle that stuff, I eat them fresh No, I wouldn't have foreign livers and hearts in the first place No, I keep my fridge very well-organised 10. Is it possible that you could be mistaken for a human? Yes No I AM a human 11. How many dusty old tomes and forbidden manuscripts can be found around your home? 0 1-3 4-9 10-74 75-199 200+ 12. Do you own any astronomical charts? Yes No No need, I've memorized all of the astronomical information I would want under any common circumstances 13. Do you own any astrological charts? Yes No No need, I've memorized all of the astrological information I would want under any common circumstances Didn't you just ask that? 14. Do you struggle with any of the following: identity-related confusion, fiscal issues, social angst, general stress? Yes No 15. Do you have an unexplainable attraction to the Falkland islands? Yes No 16. Would you consider yourself as intentionally inconspicuous? Yes No 17. Do you consider bleach, a battery-powered FM radio, and a crowbar to be enough to kill someone without ever coming near them? Yes No 18. Do you often use a false name? Yes No 19. Do you own any items with a pentagram emblazoned upon them? A heartagram? Yes to both Yes to one No to both 20. Which of the following is a type of board? Magical Voodou Cijie Board Wiji board Ouija board Weegee board Uiga board Ouigi board 21. Have you ever paid attention to the pattern of lines on your hands? Yes No 22. Mugwort tea! Potent Come again? 23. Do people often assume that you've made humour when you, in fact, have not? Yes No 24. When people talk about how they're feeling, are you often hopelessly confused? Yes No 25. Do people often accuse you of being foolish over shortcomings of yours which you do not consider at all related to intelligence? Yes No 26. Which is the ninth dimension? Serotonin Chakra Spirit A priori knowledge Beans There is no ninth dimension 27. Do you ever have a desire to consume blood? Yes No 28. Can the average schmuck tell the difference between you and a stock goth kid? Yes No I AM a goth kid. I "...hate life, truly hate the sun, and have to smoke and drink coffeyh."-The Venerable S. Park 29. Does any sort of anger, disgust, or excitement trigger your saying of anything along the lines of, "Bleagh...!" Yes No 30. Do you have noticeably larger than average eyebrows? Yes No 31. Do you chew with only one half of your mouth open? Yes No 32. Do you know how to play Gargoyle? Yes No 33. Do you flip your collar up whenever possible? Yes No 34. Can you often be found galivanting with a quirky friend who possesses any of the following: hunchback, fingerless gloves, suspenders, external hard drive, wooden pole, or speech impediment? Yes Not with any of those, but I do have a quirky friend with which I galivant No 35. If you were hit with a blast from a flamethrower, would you retain the capacity to run into the perpetrator, setting them on fire as well? Sure Who the hell can do that? 36. Which of the following would you prefer? Drinking my way through college in order to get some work, after which I'll meet a respectable (wo)man, get married, pay for a house in a nice neighborhood with nonexistant money, get a nice car and cable, have a couple of kids and instill in them traditional values of integrity, honesty, and independance whilst bending over to climb the corporate ladder, allow my kids to be raised on TV and public education and eventually die happily knowing that I had a loving spouse, the best family in the world, and a successful career, just like every other dime-a-dozen Joe Citizen Haphazardly flailing about a wet, bouncing rubber track to get to the slab of raw meat at the top on a TV game show 37. Can you easily manage to create a complete breakdown of social order with the help of a few of your friends, but find it an outstanding challenge to turn a doorknob? Yes No Only the first section Only the last bit 38. Are you completely indiscriminate in which parts of your prey you eat? Yes No or N/A 39. Have you ever walked more than 30 metres with a small animal gnawing on your leg without noticing it? Yes No 40. Are you familiar with any of the following musicians: The Zombeatles, The Rolling Kidney Stones, Bob Killin, Dead Zeppelin, Fester Fangs? Of course! Who can forget such classics as "Hey Food?" ...No 41. Do you fake being drunk because you are unable to technically become inebriated? Yes No No, but I sometimes pretend to be drunk because I enjoy annoying people 42. Do you pal around with shifty occultists and wild-eyed loons? Yes No 43. Do painkillers, aspirin, and anthestetics have unusually little effect on you? Yes No 44. Have you ever been attracted to someone by the size of their canines, hands, or eyebrows? Yes No 45. Before reading this, have you ever indepentantly come to the conclusion that you are not comfortable eating the meat of livestock, but also believe that the agricultural industry is corrupt, thus leaving one obvious food source, the consumption of which you percieve as having virtually no negative effects on anything whatsoever? Howdidjaknow?!?! Nope, can't say I have 46. Can you easily and with little thought name all of the following in one-word answers: your name, clique/style, political ideology, religion, moral philosophy, most valued personal trait, and second-largest city of Finland? Yes No, although I've given it all rather much thought in the past No 47. Where would you rather be right now? In my study, providing some young protagonists with advice In the Moroccan embassy of Hong Kong, strangling diplomats with a cello string for billz In the ninth dimension, conjuring a demonic familiar In a dark alley or clearing, brooding and pondering how to convince some metaphorical audience that you have reservations about transforming the airhead chick who's crushing on you into a vampire, although you honestly don't give a damn and are just in it for the smex Enjoying the company of a fine (wo)man at a late-night party Continued....(Select this for no effect) 48. ...Continued... Trying to knock down the defences of a pub in which several individuals are holed up alongside your bloodthirsty friends Eating some of Nalanhata's delicious Special Brownies of Undeath Taking a break and having a drink in an underground fight club in the middle of an intriguing "adventure", so to speak, involving a mysterious stranger, explosives, the English House of Parliament, and a lot of people who need ripping to shreds Shopping at Wal-Mart I have no preference 49. Of these, which is your favourite sub-genre of metal? Thrash Doom Death Power Trash Scandinavian folk 50. Did you actually bother to read the description? If not, are you aware of the schizm between sexiness and smexiness? Yes, I read it, and knew beforehand Yes, I read it and found out I didn't read it, but know I didn't read it and don't know, but am so intrigued that I will go back and do so Dunnoduncare.