What Religion Would Accept You

What religion would accept the kind of scum who surf the internet in search of quizzes? I know you want to know. Because I'm omniscient narrator Joe. And now you can find out with this easy tool! Just answer each provoking question and I'll tell you where to find eternal peace!! Woo yay!!

Oh yeah! Let's get started! Insert generic self-help phrases here! Woo! Oh yeah! Let's get started! Insert generic self-help phrases here! Woo! Oh yeah! Let's get started! Insert generic self-help phrases here! Woo!

1. What is your age?
Under 18 Years Old
18 to 24 Years Old
25 to 30 Years Old
31 to 40 Years Old
41 to 50 Years Old
51 to 60 Years Old
Over 60 Years Old
2. What is your gender?
Male
Female
3. What created the universe?
a god
some gods
big bang
beats me
4. Assume it was God. What created him?
God
BLASPHEMY!!!
Chuck Norris
beats me
I wouldn't know anything on this subject
5. Pick a fictional creature to represent you. If none are anything like you, pick the coolest one.
Siren
Dragon
The Spock
Luke Skywalker
Walker, Texas Ranger
Dwarf
6. Pick the most insulting yo momma joke type: yo momma so...
fat
stupid
ugly
blasphemous
7. Of these fake wrestlers, who is coolest?
Hulk Hogan
The Rock
Battista
Undertaker
8. How would you prefer to die?
As a martyr for your religion
As a martyr for freeing Tibet
As a hermit
After a quiet yet successful life with a spouse and some kids
9. You get 3 wishes. Right away you wish for ice cream and cash. What is your third wish?
More wishes
To meet God
More cash
10. Assume you are going for world domination. How do you do it?
Divine Intervention
Kung Fu
Tanks
Carefully Though-Out Plans That Minimize Damage To Civilians and Infrastracture
11. Do you live as you were raised?
Of course, everyone else EATS their children
Largely
People do that??
12. What is your current religion?
Christian
Jewish
Muslim
Hindu
Buddhist
Other or None
13. Do you know who Phaedrus is?
Yes, he's cool
Yes, he sucks
No
14. Someone knocks on your door are asks if Jesus is your 1 lord and saviour. How do you respond?
Tell him yes
Slam the door on his face
Kick his azz and tell him not to come back
15. If you were a ninja, what would be your weapon of choice?
A Gun
The Holy Bible
Nukes
Wisdom, Kung Fu, and/or Psychic Ability
A big pointy stick
16. Do you, or have you ever owned a deck of tarot cards?
Yeah they really work
Yeah they fun
Yeah they high in fibre
No they pointless
No they blasphemy
No they don't taste good

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Related Quizzes:

• What's your Religious Type? by Owlspirit
• Religious Literacy by Mike Little
• Are You Buddhist by Ian
• Where are you from? by Orm
• The Religious Identity Test by Dave

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