How likely is it that you would last in Ankh-Morpork?

Think you've got survival skills? HAH! Think you'd last in the Big Wahoonie?? The ONLY city in the world where outlines of corpses can be chalked on the river??? Not much chance of that, mate! But let's take the quiz anyway, shall we . . ?

A true citizen of Ankh-Morpork is really quite frightening. If you are frightening then, hey, maybe this is why! Perhaps you've been a true Ankh-Morporkian all along. Only one way to find out . . .

1. What is your age?
Under 18 Years Old
18 to 24 Years Old
25 to 30 Years Old
31 to 40 Years Old
41 to 50 Years Old
51 to 60 Years Old
Over 60 Years Old
2. What is your gender?
Male
Female
3. What weapons do you usually like to carry? (If you live in a country where this is illegal/impossible, what would you carry, given the choice?)
A sword, some big pointy sticks, a small crossbow, a few throwing knives, a meat cleaver and some drawing pins in the soles of my shoes
A simple, trusty weapon, like a sword
Nothing; I can talk my way out of any situation
Nothing; I'm a pacifist
Nothing; I'm dreadful with weapons and can't stand the sight of blood
Nothing; I'm a champion in unarmed combat
4. You dissagree with a law. What do you do?
Ignore it, blatantly
Quietly dissobey it
Grudgingly follow it
Lay down your life in order to get it changed
5. You see a friend being beaten up. What do you do?
Rush to their rescue
Hide
Report it to the Watch
Watch with interest from a safe distance
Carry on beating them up
6. This is MY standard question! Someone tries to mug you. What do you do??
Kill them
Beat them up, take their things and run
Try to get away quickly
Yell for help
Let them get on with it
7. You see a rat. What do you do?
Ignore it
Run, screaming
Kill it for fun
Eat it
8. You see a troll. What do you do?
Run
Ignore it
Point and yell, "Gravel-brain!"
Say "Hi"
Attack it
9. You see a man selling genuine pig sausages. What do you do?
Buy one; they're cheap
Ask him if he wants a fight
Steal the sausages
Politely decilne
Hide
10. What is a seamstress?
Someone who sews things up
A woman
Someone who seems to be under stress
*ahem* Well . . .
11. At about 6pm, an angry, angry man in very dented armour runs down the road, swearing. What do you do?
Stop him and ask what's wrong
Trip him up
Get out of the way, fast
12. What are your main traits?
I'm kind, honest and friendly
I'm secretive, dishonest and sneaky
I'm loud, violent and strong
I'm forward, proud and invincible
13. Others see a dead dog. I see . . .
Germs!! Argh!
Dinner
Income
... A dead dog?
14. Which of these sounds most attractive to you?
A weekend by the sea, with palm trees and perfect weather
A filthy, disease-ridden hell-hole where crime is a simple fact of life
A gorgeous member of the opposite sex
Boiled cat

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