Would you be able to handle a baby with reflux?

Babies are cute, small, and adorable! They eat, sleep, and poop - how hard can it be? But what if they have reflux?! Are you a baby-whisperer? Even if you baby is a yelping in pain and vomiting all over you?

Can you handle a baby with acid reflux or will he send you screaming into the woods? Take this short yet surprisingly accurate quiz to find out now! Created by the mother of preemie twins with severe acid reflux!

Created by: SeaBird of The SeaBird Chronicles
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1. What is your age?
Under 18 Years Old
18 to 24 Years Old
25 to 30 Years Old
31 to 40 Years Old
41 to 50 Years Old
51 to 60 Years Old
Over 60 Years Old
2. What is your gender?
Male
Female
3. If your precious baby were to begin projectile vomiting his entire meal all over you and the nursery... what would you do?
Panic! Jump! Scream!
Stuff a burp cloth in his mouth to staunch the flow.
Try to catch as much as possible in The Puke Cup you have on the table beside you for such occasions.
Your jaw just drops in awe.
4. Your baby staunchly refuses to eat anything at all for six days straight. Then, most or all of the miniscule amount you are able to force down is brought up again. Your reaction?
Start searching for the receipt to see if he's still returnable. (If he was a gift, go to Customer Service and beg for an exchange.)
Marvel at his resemblence to Old Faithful.
Keep on keeping on, forcing yourself to create that "pleasant mealtime experience" so he is not scarred for life.
5. Your baby screams as if a knife is stabbing him in the gut during each feeding.
Shush him loudly and be willing to take an hour to get in a few ounces.
Crawl under a rock and die.
Tell him to "use his words" to describe the problem.
6. You do a load of laundry at least once and day and always have clothes soaking in the sink ready for the next washing. How do you maintain a positive outlook?
Positive outlook?
Buy stock in the maker of your laundry detergent.
Paste dictionary pages to the dryer so you can learn while folding.
7. Your baby is in so much pain he cannot sleep. For six weeks straight. What is your coping mechanism?
Put your mother-in-law on night duty.
Let the swing rock him to sleep - fie on all those "teach your baby to sleep" books!
Tequila. (for both you and him)
8. Often your cute little baby pukes right out of his cute litte nose. Then screams and panics because he can't breathe. What do you say to calm him?
"It's okay. It's almost over. I've got you. You're okay."
Sorry, kiddo, guess that was bit too much tequila for ya."
(to anyone else in room) "Get me a Q-tip! Where are the Q-tips!"
9. When the pediatrician tells you there's absolutely nothing modern medicine can do to stop the puking, and we can just help him be "comfortable," what is your response?
Nod, say "I understand," and play a waiting game for the next several months until your baby grows out of it.
Take your baby to a GI specialist anyway, even though there is nothing further that can be done.
Crawl under yet another rock and die yet another death.
10. Your pediaterician tells you 50% of babies outgrow reflux by 6 months. The remaining 50% by 1 year. Your baby is 10 months and still puking his guts out and screaming during some meals. Your thoughts?
You plan to sue my pediatrician for malpractice.
Cling to the faint hope that one day you will wake up and this will all be over. Very, very soon.
Rock. Death.
11. When you try to explain what having a reflux baby is like to your friends and they say things like "oh, they'll grow out of it," "well, my kids spit up, but I just thought it was normal," and "awww, tummy troubles, poor little guy," what is your response?
Completely non-verbal. You just take out your Glock and shoot them.
Hmmm, yes. (exit quickly before you risk a felony)
12. You just happen to have TWIN babies, both with severe reflux....?
Rock. Rock. Die. Die.
Rock. Rock. Die. Die.

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