1. What is your age? Under 18 Years Old 18 to 24 Years Old 25 to 30 Years Old 31 to 40 Years Old 41 to 50 Years Old 51 to 60 Years Old Over 60 Years Old2. What is your gender? Male Female3. It's the first day of the auditions and you want to look good! What do you wear... A pair of high waisted Gucci trousers with a black Armani neck warming top A fabulous outfit from Dolce & Gabanna Something Comfortable with slippers (well, noones going to see what's under the desk are they?)4. As you get out of your car & walk past the crowds screaming your name do you... Stop to sign autographs.. Ooooh the public love me! Smile & wave whilst walking past Shout back "I love you guys"5. The stage hands ask what drink you would like on the judges desk, you reply Diet Coke in a Martini glass Still Mineral Water Freshly Squeezed Orange Juice with no pips6. You are told to go straight through to the judges room as you are late, there's no time for make up, do you Don't worry at all, you always look good Worry your wrinkles will show up a bit too much Reapply your own, as you have some with you7. The first contestant walks through the door, you... Say Good morning and ask if they feel nervous Tell them to breathe through it & the nerves will fade Tell them to get on with singing their chosen song8. The next auditonee is the most beautiful stunning girl you have ever seen, but she sounds like a squeling pig being ran over, what's your comment.. How the hell did you get this far? That was aweful! 100% NO! You have got the X factor look, I think you'll be good! 200% yes! You're a very pretty girl, but I'm gonna have to say no.. I'm sorry.9. You break for lunch & as you walk out of the room and into the coridoor, a member of the security team hands you a note left by the most gorgeous contestant you've ever seen! The note reads "Hey you! I've always dreamt of meeting you, now I have I wan Although it's very tempting, my other half would not be happy at all, I'll have to give it a miss! You think this would be great for your public image, so you call a few papperazzi & get round there with a huge bunch of red roses! You contact them & tell them to meet you at your hotel, you get security to sneek them up to the room & have a night of romance & passion!10. It's the first night of the live heats and your contestants are soo nervous. How do you help them to relax? Order them all a deep muscle massge.. that will help! Give them all a huge motherly hug & explain it's ok to be nervous. A shot of Irish whisky will do the trick11. it's the live final and you decide to play a trick on the other two judges... what is it? You put clingfilm over their toilet seats and shaving foam in their trousers! You stick your face all over their dressing room Tricks are for children & this is serious business tonight, you stick to making sure your contestant wins12. So the series is over, what's the first thing you do? Fly back home to see the family & relax Fly to barbados on the money I've just earnt.. I deserve a holiday! Fly to my home in LA to prepare for American Idol13. How would you like to be remembered from the series... The sleezy old man that makes everyones skin crawl The sometimes a little too honest judge The nice one14. It's now been 2 months since the X Factor series finished, and you are asked to do a "day in the life of.." documentry. What do you do.. What the hell, I'm used to these starring roles Well, the public do love me and it would be a shame if my fans couldn't see this. Decline the offer as I am far to busy with my next adventure