How Russian Are You

Where were you born? How were you raised? "Russians" were born in the former USSR and raised like savage beasts! Are you worthy of the title? Are you worthy of being dubbed the AK-47?

The quiz is in response to the growing number of Americanized Russians who are far too detached from the true Russian culture to be known as such. Take it and see where you stand.

1. What is your age?
Under 18 Years Old
18 to 24 Years Old
25 to 30 Years Old
31 to 40 Years Old
41 to 50 Years Old
51 to 60 Years Old
Over 60 Years Old
2. What is your gender?
Male
Female
3. What is your hair color?
Black
Brown
Blonde
Red
Mixed
Bald
4. What do you drive?
BMW
Corvette
Chevy Truck
Honda
Ford Explorer
Bike
5. Look at your shirt. What color is it?
Black
White
Brown
Red/Blue
Yellow/Green/Orange
Rainbow
6. What do you wear on your head?
Baseball Cap
Fedora
Beret
"Kasinka"
Nothing!
A helmet
7. Where are you on any given Sunday between the hours of 8 AM and 2 PM?
Hungover in my bed
At Church
At work
At my "baby's" house
In front of my TV
At the Lake
8. How were you raised?
Given a weekly allowance
Lived in a mansion
Brutally lashed for every mistake
Kicked out of the house
By a pack of wolves
9. How many kids are in your immediate family?
Only child
2
3
4
5-10
34.5
10. How does a game of volleyball at the park sound?
WTF?!
I thought volleyball was for girls?
SUPER!
Um, dude, I do that on the weekends
Not an athlete
Hockey's more my thing
11. I'm going to dig through your car. What will I find?
Jewelry
CD's
Clothes
Dirt
A pack of sunflower seeds
I don't have a car
12. Do you personally know someone named Serge?
Yes
No
That's a name?
Serge??? Like the soda?
13. Who's your best friend?
My cousin
Someone from school
A coworker
I don't have friends, I'm a loser
14. Which phrase looks most appealing?
Jibber Jabber
Blah Blah Blah
Suck it
Motherland
Bush
Yankee
15. What does this mean: "Ey, parshiviy, syuda idi!"
I like grapes!
I'm horny!
Hey jackass, get over here!
Back in 'Nam, I was a hero!
Hi, I'm asian!
Has anyone seen my iPod?

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