How Insane Are You?

"Moobs nargle nerf." "Raaaargh." "Cmon potted plant, let the repairman finish with the TV before you order me to cannibalize him." "I honestly believe that the majority of meat in MacDonalds hamburgers is USDA-approved beef." "TGI Furry Friday." "Beep beep ima Jeep." "What, me worry?"

These are all common utterances of those we refer to as the insane. But let's take a closer look at these individuals. Do they suffer from an ailment? Or are they aware of something the average man is not? Or perhaps they are simply doing it for the lulz. Whatever the case, you no doubt are here wondering whether you embody that trait. There is a certain romance about the right kind of wild-eyed mania that perhaps you see in yourself. But will this quiz verify it?

Created by: E Lunatic of Mah Profile
(your link here more info)
1. What is your age?
Under 18 Years Old
18 to 24 Years Old
25 to 30 Years Old
31 to 40 Years Old
41 to 50 Years Old
51 to 60 Years Old
Over 60 Years Old
2. What is your gender?
3. Do you ever babble unintelligibly?
No, I always speak formally
No, but I very often say things that no-one seems to understand
Yes, when I'm drunk, or in another such circumstance
Yes, I sometimes blurt out gibberish
4. Do you ever imagine killing other humans?
No! Never.
Sometimes, for a moment when someone pisses me off
Yes, whenever someone makes me angry
Often, with people whom I dislike
Often, and not necessarily people whom I even know
Often, not necessarily people whom I even know, and I always think of gruesome new ways to do so
5. In the last question, did I say "other humans" quite liberally?
6. What are you most likely to do if, for example, you walk into a room and hear someone lying while telling about something?
Say, "That's not right--this is the way it happened..." And tell the truth
Say, "Bull....!" And tell the truth
Say, "Atsa roight bit-a pig poize, en." And tell the truth
Say, "No..." And wait to be questioned
Do any of the above, but instead of telling the truth, lie in another way even if you will not benefit
Stab the guy
7. Are you able to bend your thumb in such a way that the section connecting the wrist and palm protrudes from the hand at aproximately a 45 degreee angle, the next section is parallel to the hand, and the end section is positioned at aproximately a 90 degree angle relative to the hand?
Yes, but only with intervention from my other fingers
8. When you are absent-mindedly doing paperwork, you most likely...
Nibble your fingernails or writing utensil
Scratch or play with your hair
Scratch or play with the hair on your hands/arms
Gnaw on your thumb
Twitch and look from side to side
All except the first 2
9. Do people say that you smell strange, even though you think you smell fine?
Yes, even though I take good care of my hygiene
Yes, although perhaps I don't shower enough
No, because I'm aware that I'm filthy
10. Of the following, which do you consider the most attractive in the preferred gender?
The obvious ones
Twitchy eyes
Grotesquely twisted smirking lips
11. ...And of these?
Rotting flesh
12. Person #1, who has wavy brown hair and wears a blue sweater, bets his friend Person #2, who has not cut his fingernails in exactly 6 days and 15 hours, that she cannot guess his religious affinity. She asks him to vocalize the numeral 10. Immediately before doing so, he smiles. Person #2 is able to guess correctly. Based on the information given, can you determine his religion?
No, I can't
No, it's impossible to tell
Yes, he's obviously a Satanist
Yes, he's obviously a Hindu
Yes, he's obviously a M00finizt
13. What do you think about the taste of blood?
It's disgusting
It's delicious
Both of the above
I like it, but would prefer it to be less salty
I'm indifferent
I've never tasted blood
14. When no-one is around, do you ever gnaw on pieces of furniture?
Yes, and when they are around as well
15. Who was the president of the United states from 2000-2004?
George Dubya
Al Gore
Barack Obama
Chuck Norris
The Duke of Sandwich
It doesn't matter, the president is just a pawn and has never been "elected" anyway
16. Are you hungry right now?
You know, I wasn't, but since I started taking this quiz I'm getting there
17. A mad genius is...
A stereotypical movie character
The only kind of genius
The only variety of madman
Usually also an evil genius
All of the above
18. Have you every seen an apparition? If so, which of these best describes the experience?
Maybe, I'm not sure...
Yes, but only for a moment
Yes, only for a moment, but I seemed to be able to sense things about it
Yes, very clearly
Yes, very clearly, and often
19. Would you say that the following description matches your hands: Two deep lines at most joints, three deep lines on the palm with several less-deep lines in other places and very many subtler lines visible at any given point?
Not even close
20. Haw many tendons are visible on the back of your relaxed hand, discounting the knuckle area?
5 (+?)
21. Do those hand-related questions remind you of any of the following words?
Riff Raff
All of the above
None of the above
22. Which of the following best describes your most likely arm motion when cheering?
Shoulder and elbow at about a 90 degree angle, with either hand or pointer finger motion, possibly circular elbow motion
Vertical motion with clenched fist
Flailing every which-way
Open hand with horizontal motion, shoulder and elbow at acute angles
None of the above
23. The lunar cycle is important to your...
Both of the above
None of the above
None of the above, shiftyeyes
24. Do you vocalize "shiftyeyes" when you have shifty eyes?
25. Why are humans superior to animals?
Because of our reasoning capacity and aptitude for technology
Because of our capacity for morality
Because the hunting of humans for their protein-rich meat is unlikely to negatively impact ecology
We aren't
They aren't
26. Are the ninjas watching you.
Yes. One would be a fool not to expect that the ninjas will be watching them. Hell, I AM a ninja and I watch the ninjas and the ninjas are still watching me.
27. If you were to see an average person, the best simile is that it would be like another average person seeing...
A third average person
A puppet
A steak
A puppet filled with steaks
A puppet filled with soy-based meat substitutes
28. Under what circumstance, furthest down the list applicable, would you be willing to kill and eat a man?
Only to survive
If doing so would somehow save the lives of more people
If I had had to kill him for whatever reason and found no other way to hide the evidence
In a spontaneous moment of rage or mania
Whenever I'm hungry
29. In the case that that you've just gotten a life sentence for killing and eating that man, when asked why you did it, you would most likely reply...
Nothing, because I didn't kill or eat anyone
I did what I had to do.
I'm sowwy momma ;_;.
Nothing. Just stare at my feet.
Well, I mean, I had to eat SOMETHING, and the corner store was closed, so...
I did it for the lulz.
30. You are, in most cases, more attracted to things or people which are...
Sexually attractive
Smexually attracive
31. Do you consider yourself to be a goth or punk? If so, do you shop at Hot Topic?
Yes and yes
Yes and no, Hot Topic is corporate bulls--- intent on exploiting my lifestyle and I won't support them
Yes and no, there are other stores which I prefer
No and no
32. "Because sometimes...even elephants need to forget."-Some dude whose name I forget
33. If you were angry at your friends for whatever reason, you would most likely...
Ignore it
Argue with them
Start a fight
Kidnap one of them, shackle them in your basement, and torture them to death over several days
Devote the next six months or more to writing and publish a novel which includes a bunch of transvestite characters named after all of them

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