What Rabbinic School Do You Belong To?

Rabbi Akiva and Rabbi Ishmael symbolize two fields of thought in Jewish theology. For over a millennium and a half, their ideologies have clashed against one another and challenged the way we perceive and interact with scripture, the world, and God. This brief and entertaining quiz was created in order to continue the challenge and dialectic.

So who are you, Akiva or Ishmael? The line is drawn in the sand. Though no question is perfect and no answer complete, take this quiz to find out which side and school of thought you might stand on.

1. What is your age?
Under 18 Years Old
18 to 24 Years Old
25 to 30 Years Old
31 to 40 Years Old
41 to 50 Years Old
51 to 60 Years Old
Over 60 Years Old
2. What is your gender?
Male
Female
3. The powers that be are defiling the holy sanctuary of your god. What do you do?
revolt and rebel against the godless sons of Belial
seek accomodation, adaptation, and dialogue
4. What is the better way to understand biblical texts?
heavenly vision
human reason
5. Every word, every letter, every jot, every tittle, even the spaces between letters reveal divine wisdom.
someone's sniffing too much of that most holy incense
could heaven and earth contain all that YHWH has given in his Word?
6. By this law, all other laws are fulfilled:
love your neighbor as yourself
have no other god before me
7. You're wise. Your beard is long. And holy Moses, people like you. So how many disciples do you take?
let the floodgates be opened and let all men be drenched in the dew of heaven
those who are wealthy, of good influence, and don't ask stupid questions
8. Thousands of years from now, when we look back on history, we'll see that the Sages:
followed in your footsteps
drank of your wisdom without remembering your name
all but forgot you
9. The purpose of religion is to service:
the world to come
living in the world now
10. No man may see YHWH and live. (Exodus 33:20)
This is obviously not speaking literally. What of those about whom it was said "they saw the God of Israel" (Exodus 24:10-11)?
What of "no man" do you not understand? It was only ever a "likeness of" that anyone beheld.
11. Why do righteous people suffer and why do the wicked prosper?
the answer is in heaven, but heaven is silent
afflictions of the righteous are precious and tranquility of the wicked is just, for whatever YHWH does is good
12. What do you think about miracles?
there's probably a natural explanation
they're everywhere... glory upon glory... as divinity itself acts in and with creation

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