Which Cartoon Character are you?

Cartoons are people too . . . except when they are animals of course. But they have their own unique personalities and styles, and all are valuable in their own way (even the doss ones like Mickey Mouse) just like Mortal Orchard posters.

Cartoons transcend gender, so don't be surprised if your cartoon 'familiar' is of a different gender, or even a different species. And don't forget to get back to us all on the Orchard and tell us which toon you inadvertently identified yourself with by doing a stupid quiz. Have you really nothing better to do with your time?

1. What is your age?
Under 18 Years Old
18 to 24 Years Old
25 to 30 Years Old
31 to 40 Years Old
41 to 50 Years Old
51 to 60 Years Old
Over 60 Years Old
2. What is your gender?
Male
Female
3. If you had to imagine yourself as an animal, what animal would you be?
Rabbit
Bird
Elephant
Rodent
I'd stick to being human, thank you.
4. Imagine that up ahead you can see Wylie E Coyote laying down landmines on the road that you want to traverse. How would you react?
Speed up, and run over the road before he's finished.
You'd approach him directly and try to talk to him about his behaviour.
You'd launch your personal flying machine and fly over him.
You would have your bodyguards shoot him dead immediately.
You'd continue on your way and take the consequences.
5. Which one of these careers would you most enjoy?
Night-club hostess
Secret Agent
Homemaker; a wife and mother
Prefer just to lounge around and not work at all.
Manual labour
6. Thinking about social class - I know it's not very classy to mention it, but are you . . .
Vair vair posh
Just an ordinary Joe/Josephine
A rebel on the edge of society
7. Which leisure pursuit would you prefer?
Tennis on the lawn
Bowling in the alley
A nice drive
A night-club, something cold, someone hot
Relaxing in the countryside
8. Thinking about your nationality. (Pick whichever is nearest to your real answer. There are no Scottish toons in this quiz.)
I'm a citizen of the world.
I'm English, terribly English really.
I feel American in many ways.
Je suis Francaise. Malheureusement.
I'm an animal. Concepts of citizenship do not apply.
9. You're out for dinner, but there's not much of a menu. Pick one.
Salad
A great big thick steak
Fish
Just some berries or nuts or grubs or something
10. Tell me about your love life.
I'm happily married thank you.
I'm happy breaking hearts . . but I'll settle down one day.
I'm my own person, a rolling stone, gathering no moss
11. When you're in trouble, you get out of it by . . .
A nice smile and a cute look
I run run run away
I talk my way out of it
I don't get out of it. I usually get in deeper!
I have my methods, high-tech and secret.
Rational, adult negotiations and problem-solving.
12. How do you like to dress in the privacy of your own home?
As nature intended - as little as possible
Glamour, panache, flash
Elegant, classy, understated
Practical and neat
13. OK - complete wildcard to close. Which Mortal Orchard poster are you most like?
Everso
Chris Mac (Lord)
XXXXPremiereXXXX
Alpha Hooligan
Betty
Brunhilde

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