3 chinese tortures

Thread Topic: 3 chinese tortures

barberbob2
Joined: Dec 10, '09
Status: Advanced
2012-02-05 13:54:57
A young man was lost wandering in a forest, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by an ancient Chinese man with a long, grey beard.

"I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?"

"Certainly," the Chinese man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will inflict upon you the three worst Chinese tortures known to man."

"Ok," said the man, thinking that the daughter must be pretty old as well, and entered the house.

Before dinner, the daughter came down the stairs. She was young, beautiful, and had a fantastic figure. She was obviously attracted to the young man since she couldn't keep her eyes off him during the meal.

Remembering the old man's warning, he ignored her and went up to bed alone. But during he night, he could bear it no longer, and sneaked into her room for a night of passion.

He was careful to keep everything quiet so the old man wouldn't hear.

Near dawn he crept back to his room, exhausted, but happy.

He woke to feel a pressure on his chest. Opening his eyes he saw a large rock on his chest with a note on it that read,

"Chinese Torture 1: Large rock on chest."

"Well, that's pretty crappy," he thought.

"If that's the best the old man can do then I don't have much to worry about."

He picked the boulder up, walked over to the window and threw the boulder out.

As he did so he noticed another note on it that read:

"Chinese Torture 2: Rock tied to left testicle."

In a panic he glanced down and saw the rope that was already getting close to the end. Figuring that a few broken bones was better than castration, he jumped out of the window after the boulder.

As he plummeted downward he saw a large sign on the ground that read,

"Chinese Torture 3: Right testicle tied to bedpost."
Carri04
Joined: Jun 15, '09
Status: Hot Shot
2012-02-05 17:42:07
LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Anastasia
Joined: Jun 11, '09
Status: Hot Shot
2012-02-05 17:45:44
XD That old Chinese man pwns.
Phoenix Night
Joined: Apr 4, '11
Status: Junior
2012-02-05 17:48:43
I love that old Chinese man.
Horseluver
Joined: Mar 2, '11
Status: Experienced
2012-02-05 18:24:41
I love dads that are serious about their daughters. Don't mess with them or they'll PWN you!
firegirl88
Joined: Oct 27, '11
Status: Junior
2012-02-05 20:31:27
LOL! PWNED!
Appayipyip42
Joined: Jan 24, '10
Status: Advanced
2012-02-05 21:31:02
That's a real father.
zeronightshade
Joined: Jan 12, '12
Status: Novice
2012-02-05 21:38:56
LoL!
Hephaestuschild
Joined: Oct 20, '10
Status: Senior
2012-02-08 17:31:23
LOL YES
flibber
Joined: Mar 15, '11
Status: Junior
2012-02-08 17:32:23
LOL!!!
VegeKaka
Joined: Aug 2, '10
Status: Senior
2012-02-08 17:37:03
YES.