Are You A Coke Fiend?

A lot of people indulge in party favors now and then, but there's a line between the casual coke user and the coke fiend. Some may go into the bathroom with their friends just for kicks, while others make 20 trips a night to get a taste of that sweet sweet gutter glitter.

So, in the hopes of illuminating your own coke use, I've created this quiz to help you figure out just where you land on the continuum. With any luck, you're a true coke fiend just like yours truly.

1. What is your age?
Under 18 Years Old
18 to 24 Years Old
25 to 30 Years Old
31 to 40 Years Old
41 to 50 Years Old
51 to 60 Years Old
Over 60 Years Old
2. What is your gender?
Male
Female
3. It's Friday night and you just got paid. Your friend is placing an order for the evening. You:
Go in for a $20. That should last you just fine.
Suggest you split a $50 for the evening.
Go down for at least a hundred. That way you get a bonus $20 and hey, if you got the money, why not?
4. Your implement of choice is:
Whatever you can find at the moment - keys, fingernail, etc.
The pen cap you hide your bag in.
The special cokespoon necklace you wear 24/7, of course!
5. "Adrenaline," by Rosetta Stone, "Twist of Cain," by Danzig, "Nosecandy," by Leaetherstrip, or "Accuracy," by The Cure makes you want to:
Dance, maybe...
Think about drugs...
Run to the bathroom, STAT!
6. It's 2am and you're running low. A friend asks you for a bump. You:
Say you're fresh out. Self-preservation must prevail sometime!
Lead the way into the bathroom, because, after all, sharing is caring!
Direct them to another friend who's holding.
7. It's 3am and your bag is empty. You:
Decide to wind down, because you'll be calling it a night soon. Time for another drink!
Ask everyone you know in the bar if they have any left. Offer money if you have to.
Do #2, and commence calling every dealer you know.
8. You get home after a night of partying and realize you have half a bag left.
Break out the razor and mirror and put on your American Psycho DVD. Time for an all-nighter!
Do a bump and make a drink and/or light a joint. Last one for good measure!
Put it on the shelf and hop into bed. Now there's more for next time!
9. You've squeezed into the bathroom with as many as:
1 other person. Any more would be weird.
2 people.
3+. The more the merrier!
10. You're at a bar and it's your friend's birthday. Of course, they are serving cake. You:
Have a little when offered to you. Then throw the rest away in secret.
Have a whole piece. You can get your buzz back later!
Nearly get sick at the sight of food and others eating it. Run to the nearest bathroom to bump up.
11. You have the phone number for:
1 dealer. That's all you really need.
2 dealers. Better safe than sorry!
3+ dealers. Because you never f---ing know...
12. When doing lines you use:
Only bills $20 and above. The higher, the better.
Any piece of paper you can find.
Nothing. Bumps are less intense and therefore best.
13. You have an empty bag. You:
Tap out some dust and throw it away.
Rip it open, and scrape it out thoroughly.
Rip it, scrape it, and pop that sucker in your mouth for good measure.
14. For a bump you've:
Pleaded politely.
Paid money.
Provided sexual favors.

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